dennis is my puppet

hello readers, this is tucker the canadian vizsla. i have a tip that might help you get more sleep in the morning while you’re waiting for breakfast. see, it used to be that when mommy was getting breakfast for us dogs, i would whine and carry on and bark and get underfoot and generally make a pest of myself. this doesn’t get me breakfast any faster but it makes sure mommy knows i’m really, really, really hungry. dennis watched me do this for a few weeks, and now he’s starting to do it himself. this means that i don’t have to pester mommy anymore; dennis does it for me, and i can sleep in, knowing that somebody is incessantly reminding mommy that we haven’t eaten yet. a perfect plan, isn’t it?

so if you have somebody who’s slow getting your breakfast in the morning, don’t pester them yourself; find a stooge to do it for you, and get yourself an extra fifteen minutes of snoozing. being a criminal mastermind is hard work and we need our sleep.

i will hug it and kiss it and name it george

hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog i was hoping yoo can help me convins mama and dada not to get rid of the rat in the garaj i wood like to keep it as a pet if i wore clothes i wood carry it in my poket but since i am a vizsla dog all i have is a kollar and it duznt hav poketses but the rat can ride on my hed like in that movee ratatooeythe rat in that movee even new how to cook so maybe this one duz too we wont no until we let it in the kitchen but its worth a try

ennyway i wood like to have a littl frend to carry arownd and wen i get bord with it i cood eet it problem solvd dont you think???

7 fakts abowt me by dennis the vizsla dog

hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog i got taggd by my frends at 4urpets so that meens im supposed to tell yoo seven fakts yoo dont know abowt me so heer goes ok

one i am afrayd of kitchen noises and bark at dada wen he is cooking or emptying the dishwasher or putting pots and pans away i dont know why but i just kant help it and ennyway hes reely noizy when hes in there

too i like to go owtside and sit behind the shiff … shiffl … the big leefy tree arownd by the bak corner of the howse but there are beez there now and mama wont let me go neer them i dont know why i cant play with those beez when i play with the ones i got for krismas

three it reely was me hoo tore up the chase lounj dont tell ennybody ok?

for i have scars all over most from before i kame to my new howse but one on my noze i got when i busted out of the metal krate

five my feet look like they belong on a rabbit

six mama and dada sumtimes call me “abe frohman the sausage king of chicago” for reezons i dont reely understand

seven i dont like to go owt in the car unless my brudder tucker the other vizsla dog comes along with me otherwise im nervous

well those are sum fakts about me i have to go lik whats left of myself now ok bye