Dennis vs. The Elevator

So today we took Tucker to the veterinary chiropractor, because he’s been stiff and twitchy since his adventures at Fiesta Island last week.  (It turns out he had nearly luxated his patella, which can evidently require surgery to repair if a luxation actually occurs.  He won’t need surgery, although he’s definitely a little sore down there.  Tucker got his revenge on the chiropractor by farting right in her face while she was working on him.)

As per usual, Dennis came along for the ride, but this time he got more of a ride than he bargained for.

When we got to the doctor’s office, though, we discovered that the outdoor stairway was closed for repairs, so we had to take the elevator.  Tucker, of course, trotted right into it, but Dennis wanted nothing to do with that mysterious small room with the sliding door.  After much coaxing, we persuaded him to enter, but he was not at all happy when the door closed behind him, and even less happy when the room started to move.  He flattened himself against the floor as if the elevator were shooting up at like 50 Gs, and was ready to bolt the instant the doors opened on the second floor.

When we were leaving, we once again had to try to persuade Dennis to get onto the elevator.  This time he knew what he was getting into, though, and refused to come on.  So I’m there leaning against the door to keep it open while my wife is trying to bribe/cajole/drag/push Dennis aboard and Tucker is tapping his foot impatiently.  (Well, not really.)  Dennis was having none of it, though (think Tom Cruise trying to get Dustin Hoffman onto a non-Qantas airliner in Rain Man), and evidently elevators have some sort of sensor in them that tells them when the door has been held open for too long because it started buzzing an alarm.  This startled everyone and I moved away from the door, which started to close verrrrry slowlyyyyy, with Dennis and my wife on the outside, and Tucker and me on the inside.

Being a longtime subscriber to The New Yorker, I had just been reading “Up and then Down”, which is among other things the story of a man who was trapped on an elevator in New York City for 41 hours.  With that tale fresh in mind, I hustled Tucker out before the doors closed.  We ended up finding another stairway on the other side of the building, which we used to return to the ground floor.

On the way back to the car, we passed the elevator again.  Right as we were going by, the doors opened (I had already pressed the button for the first floor before exiting) as if beckoning us to try again.  Dennis got as far away from it as he could; now he probably thinks the thing is stalking him …

3 Comments on “Dennis vs. The Elevator

  1. Hi Dennis – nice to meet you! My mum is going to be training as an animal chiropractor – I hope she doesn’t practice on me! Hope your pal’s leg is ok. I’m with you on the elevator – just not natural.

    Dennis says: hello charlie nice to meet yoo too tuckers dooing ok he wuz moaning a littel so mama gave him sum metakam and he felt better today he seems all rite boy its a drag getting old i think i will stay a puppy forever ok bye

    Like

  2. Wow! I’ve never been on an Elevator! I bet that was scary.

    Dennis says: oh it was verry weerd i think it must be sum sort of teleporter or sumthing becuz the doorz close and your in wun place and then they open and your sumware else how bizarr is that ok bye

    Like

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