It has been three weeks since I was taken as a pet by the monstrous ape that rules Skull Island. Sometimes I despair of ever escaping my captivity, recovering the Giant Kong, and getting off this desolate rock; but I am Dennis the Vizsla, and I never give up. I merely have to bide my time, and wait for the right opportunity.
Spending all my time in King Kong’s cave, I soon lose track of time. Only by scratching lines on the wall can I tell what day it is and how long my imprisonment has lasted. It is by this crude calendar that I know I have been here for nearly a month when, to my immense surprise, King Kong announces that he is leaving Skull Island to perform in a play on Broadway. My initial exhilaration at impending freedom is dashed when I am further informed that I will be staying behind, and that King Kong’s adolescent brother will be looking after me instead.
Unfortunately, Young Kong is full of the impetuousness of youth. As soon as he takes possession of King Kong’s cavern, things begin to change. First, he challenges me to a belching contest, which I cannot hope to win.
After thus humiliating me, Young Kong, displaying a surprising degree of ingenuity, adapts the Giant Kong for some use that I do not fully understand, but which appears to give him what he refers to as “the munchies”.
He then drags me along on a sushi run. This being Skull Island, there are no actual sushi restaurants, but Young Kong doesn’t let that stop him.
Watching Young Kong transform a giant octopus into sashimi is disturbing enough, but the night’s horrors have only just begun. Later, Young Kong brings me along to a local monster nightclub, where I am forced to watch him do the hustle with a never-ending parade of enormous, grotesque, and scantily-clad creatures.
Then, disaster strikes. A mysterious swarm of black helicopters appears overhead, conducting a raid on the nightclub. The beasts scatter into the darkness, but Young Kong is captured and bound in preparation for being carried away. Still, he manages to keep hold of the Giant Kong. If I do not want to lose track of it forever, there is only one thing I can do; and as he is lifted into the air, I grab hold and go along for the ride.
I have no idea where these mysterious commandos are taking us or what they want with Young Kong. I can only hope that once we reach our destination, I will find someone I can reason with, someone who will understand the scientific value of the Giant Kong and, perhaps, permit me to take it back to the archeology department for study. Because I am Dennis the Vizsla, and I never give up.