EXILED

HELLO HUMAN SERVANTS, THIS IS TROUBLE THE KITTY. SOME OF YOU MAY HAVE HEARD RUMORS THAT I WAS DRIVEN OUT OF MY KINGDOM, ALSO KNOWN AS THE COUNTER IN THE GARAGE, BY A SWARM OF BEES. I AM NOW HOLDING A PRESS CONFERENCE TO ADDRESS THESE RUMORS.

YES, SADLY, THE STORIES ARE TRUE. DURING LAST WEEK’S HEAT WAVE MY KINGDOM WAS INDEED INVADED BY BEES, AND MY HUMAN SERVANT DADA HAD TO COME IN THROUGH THE SWARM OF THEM AND CARRY ME TO SAFETY. I HAVE NOT REWARDED HIM FOR THIS BECAUSE SUCH SERVICES ARE EXPECTED FROM HUMAN SERVANTS.

DESPITE WHAT HAS BEEN SUGGESTED ELSEWHERE, THESE WERE NO ORDINARY BEES.  THEY WERE OBVIOUSLY SENT BY “SOMEONE” WHO WANTED ME OUT OF THE GARAGE SO THAT HE COULD TAKE IT OVER HIMSELF:

AFTER BEING ROUTED FROM MY LONGTIME ABODE, I SET UP A GOVERNMENT-IN-EXILE IN THE BATHROOM, WHERE (AS BEFITS SOMEONE OF MY STATURE) I HAD ALL THE COMFORTS OF HOME:

HOWEVER, I SOON GREW LONELY IN MY EXILE, SPENDING HOURS CALLING OUT FOR RESCUE, THE WAY I USED TO CALL MY SISTER POOH BEAR WHEN SHE FIRST WENT MISSING. EVENTUALLY I BEGAN TO LOSE MY GRIP ON REALITY. I AM TOLD I BEHAVED IN A STRANGE MANNER AND LAY DOWN IN INAPPROPRIATE PLACES, ALTHOUGH I HAVE NO MEMORY OF THESE EVENTS.

REALIZING THAT I HAD TO TAKE ACTION TO RECLAIM MY TERRITORY, I CALLED IN A FAVOR OWED TO ME FROM A LONG, LONG TIME AGO:

AND BROUGHT “SOMEONE’S” BEE ARMY TO HEEL:

NOT LONG AGO, WE SAW THAT OLD AGE AND CUNNING ALWAYS DEFEATS YOUTH AND EXUBERANCE. BE WARNED, “SOMEONE” AND “SOMEONE’S FRIENDS” — I AM AS OLD AND AS CUNNING AS YOU THREE PUT TOGETHER. PURR PURR PURR.

22 thoughts on “EXILED

  1. Poor kitty. I am glad to see you are no longer in exile and have your throne back. it must have been difficult for you. And I only eat cat food that has already been eaten first, by the way.

    Like

  2. Mango says:

    Your dada is very brave to rescue you from the bees. How awful. You need to stay in the safe house as long as required to feel better.

    Slobbers,
    Mango

    Like

  3. Grace the Saint (Bernard) says:

    I am glad you were able to reclaim your territory – know in the future you can come over here for rescue if you need it. COME HERE KITTTTI KITTTTI, I just want to play, I want to be your friend.
    It is a shame your sister and brothers don’t want to come over and play with me… I am just a little Saint.

    Like

  4. Trouble kitty, if you lay in that box, the dogs cannot get to the snacks!! Dad says bees are PURE EVIL I dunno about all that, I think he is a big sissy. I hope you get your kingdom back soon, I am sure Dennis is waiting for you to get the heck out.

    Like

  5. Hey Trouble if you is done with the Thunderkittys can you send them over here? I jest need a little help over here there is too much evil (Star) and too menny bees (that Star is not eating) and not enuff hours in the day and it seems like you have a lot of contakts. If the Thunderkittys are too bizzy mebbe you could hook me up with HeMan or his fearsum sister SheRa or GI Joe the Amerikan Hero or the Silverhawks wut are partly metal and partly real. I will make it werth yer wile. OK thanks!!

    Yer pal Dozer

    Like

  6. The bee man has my favourite shirt!!!
    Make him give it back or I’ll sent Super Postal Avenger to wreak havock!!!
    You, Cat, have been warned…..

    Like

  7. pointerpandemonium says:

    So glad to see you has your throne back Trouble!! Looks like “someone” will be getting some trouble soon….Look out!!xx

    Like

  8. Bees they are always crashing into somecats space.
    I am glad you got rid of them… living in the tub looks like the pits. I would hate being so close to my necessary room.. yuck.

    Like

hello nice reeder its dennis the vizsla dog hay leev me a peemail if yoo want to!!! ok bye

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.