the faktry toor!!!

hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay wel if yoo hav been following my tweets then yoo may hav gottin the impreshun that their is sum sort of laber ishyoo at my pig powders faktry however nuthing cud be further from the trooth heer at dennises pig powders we hav a wunderful wurking environment and all owr mini macgyvers ar happy and wel kayrd for!!!  to proov it and also in hopes of attrakting sum ventcher kapital i wood like to invite yoo on a toor of the pig powders faktry and then to a meeting with the mini macgyvers ware yoo wil see just how thrild the mini macgyvers ar to hav jobs ok lets go!!!

just like the benevolent kaptins of industry frum the socalld gilded age of american manyoofaktchooring i too provide both a wurking and living environment for my employees so lets start with the howzing wot i provide to my mini macgyvers owt of the gudness of my hart:

yes hoo woodnt want to live in this sumptchoous nayborhud??? and ware else cud yoo go to sleep evry nite to the melodius sownds of hevvy industryal ekwipment bilding new storadj silos for my pig powders in yore bakyard??? noware else thats ware!!! ok lets hed up the rode to the akchooal pig powders faktry shall we?

as yoo can see dennises pig powders is a verry kleen and hi tek fasility wot blends neerly invisibly into its surrowndings why i can hardly eeven see it bak their!!! ok lets go inside and tayk a luk at the control senter wot keeps evrything running smoothly down on the faktry floor:

oh ha ha pay no attenshun to that bloo skreen of deth on that windows 95 masheen their its suppozed to do that and besides that just controls the device on the faktry floor wot administers elektrik shoks to employeez wot arnt mooving fast enuf but i am shoor that by now all those slakkers hav ben weeded owt ok now heer is wot i no yoo hav all ben wayting for a visit to the faktry floor itself ware the mini macgyvers ar cloned and then put into cans for distribyooshun now it seems that no cans hav akchooally come owt of the faktry in the last week or so but i am shoor that wunse i hav a tawk with the staff that produkshun wil ramp rite bak up to ware it shud be ok lets go!!!

ummmmmm hay sorry but we hav to cut the toor short i ummmmmm forgot that today is employee appreesheeayshun day and they ar having a private barbekyoo so ummmm lets just tiptoe bak to my privat helikopter and hed on bak to corporate hedkwarters ok bye

18 thoughts on “the faktry toor!!!

  1. What a wonderful fhaktory Dennis. What will you doos with your millions of dollars profit? x


  2. Hey, Dennis, do you need a corporate attorney — just in case there are contracts to draw up? I’m tired of defending people in Federal Court.


  3. Dennis you must have been sucked into the world of corporate green at some point during one on your many adventures. Its a bad place Dennis!


  4. Hey Dennis, I could do with a part-time job to supplement my meagre pension. I can’t do ‘rithmatic to save my life but I do have good admin skills. Could I work from home, or if not, could you send the Magic Flying Coaster to fetch me to work? My hourly rates are very reasonable and I know stuff. All I would need for my complete and proper induction into your esteemed industry would be a quick course in the nature and purpose of your product.

    OK, of course the picture on mine bloggie, and all the pictures on yours, are real, genuine and true. Those purples who doubt them are seriously deranged misguided.

    Yours very respectfully,
    Black Cat
    (Hopeful) Administrative Personal Assistant to Dennis the Vizsla, Esteemed Managing Director
    🙂 xxx


  5. DENNIS. This is TAN Torkelson, I am on my way. Check out our BLOG I borrowed a picture I hope you do not mind. I am going to help you FIGHT those mutinizing macguyvers!!!!!!!!!!


  6. LOL SO funny and WOW What a big operation. I see you have a few applicants black say’s They know stuff. LOL I’d like to put that on my resume. And send the flying Coaster how fun would that be.


  7. hey Dennis, I think Tan Torkelson might be able to help you out of this mess, although an army of MacGuyvers might have a few tricks up their sleeves. Last time I checked, Tanner didn’t have any sleeves.


    P.S. So glad you are tweeting!!! I am a much better tweeter than blogger


  8. Hi Dennis – thanks for the tour. Since our holiday we are having to do a refresher course in Dennis language although, worryingly, we were getting very adept at it!!!We missed you – ok, bye xxx


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