The Oceanside Animals
And their imaginary friends
a skolarly treetis on eevil skwirrel wizzerds
hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay reesently my gud frend mango relentlessly huge posted a pikcher of skwirrels engayjds in wot he thawt mite be a nice game of bitey fayse however upon kloser inspekshun and after eksawstiv reesertch i hav confirmd that this in fakt a pikcher of a skwirrel nekromanser in the prosess of mayking an army of zombie skwirrels to do its bidding!!! now i no wot yoo ar thinking yoo ar thinking oh shoor dennis that sownds like another wun of yore paranoyd fantaseez however i hav pruf wot i hav kollekted in the skolarly treetis wot yoo see here!!!
ok first heer is the orijinal pikcher wot i obtaynd at grayt persunal risk frum the interwebs this pikcher kleerly shows the skwirrel wizzerd is armd with a majik wand wot it is yoozing to kreate its walnut seeking zombie hoard:
yoo can tel that the skwirrel on the grownd is a zombie on akkownt of how it slurs the wurd walnuts!!! ok delving deeper into the kareer of this nefaryus skwirrel wizzerd we can see sum of its triks of the trayd for instanse in this pikcher the skwirrel is yoozing the notoryus hand of glory in an effort to keep my brother tucker the other vizsla from wayking up wile the skwirrel wizzerd pilladjes the howse:
littel duz the skwirrel wizzerd no he is waysting time and enerdjy becuz tucker sleeps all day ennyway!!! ha ha ok mooving on we can see by the company he keeps that this skwirrel wizzerd is up to no gud for instanse in this foto the skwirrel wizzerd is hanging owt with the wikked witch of the west and isshyooing orders to the flying monkeys like they were his verry own henchchimps!!!
unfortchoonatly throwing water on a skwirrel wizzerd only mayks him mad and so dorothy and her frends wer unaybel to rid the wurld of this mennis as can be kleerly seen in this layter foto in wich the skwirrel wizzerd is assisting the eevil voldemort during an assawlt on the ministry of majik:
of korse sumtimes the skwirrel wizzerd wil strike owt on his own like in this pikcher heer in which … um … oh sorry this is wen the skwirrel wizzerd wuz gest conduktor at the orkestra i gess eeven evil skwirrel wizzerd okayzhunaly like to support the arts but that still duznt mayk him a gud guy!!!
ah this is more like it heer we can see that the skwirrel wizzerd is going up aginst the faymus marvel sooperhero and sorserer soopreem doctor strayndj in hopes of steeling wun of his valyooabul artifakts!!!
dont wurry doctor strayndj i am shoor that the avengers wil show up in the nik of time to help yoo owt aginst yore nemesis doctor skwirrel!!! but sumtimes the skwirrel wizzerds plots arnt reely eevil they ar just silly for instanse he wunse attempted to enchant brums to mayk them gather walnuts for him lazy lazy skwirrel wizzerd
as yoo can see the skwirrel wizzerd has menny diffrent skils and abiliteez and is abel to kawze all sorts of mistchif so if yoo happin to see him do not attempt to apprehend him yoreself!!!
and their yoo hav it a skolarly treetis on eevil skwirrel wizzerds!!! ok bye
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23 Comments on “a skolarly treetis on eevil skwirrel wizzerds”
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We been having problems trying to post on your site lately. You sure the bad wizard squirrel haven’t gotten to your blog?? 😛
We’re quite sure we saw ’em recently – making a dash for it, running across the telephone wires (we still have our wires hung across poles in our neck of the woods. We tried to catch ’em but he was too quick!
Licks and wags
The Dog WOods Pack
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I always knew squirrels were No Good. The squirrel wizard seems especially evil.
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Oooh. That’s why all the squirrels here stand and look at me – they are Zombies!!! I would have never known. This Squirrel Wizard is an evil genius, a Master Criminal, so to speak. Where is Mango when we need him?!?
*scared kissey face*
-Fiona
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We have what seems like hundreds of squirrels in our neighborhood. Are they all Zombies or evil necromancers?
Let me know as soon as possible. I have to tell my Mom.
Kisses,
Stella
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Dennis, we think we have had a sighting of this evil squirrel wizard here in Scotland. He was wearing a kilt and playing the bagpipes at the time but we are pretty certain it was him. Let us know what action you want us to take!!!
love
Martha & Bailey xxxx
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That squirrel wizard has got a lot of nerve trying to mess with those he should not be messing with!
He needs to be taught a few basic lessons in life~~~~ 🙂
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Squirrels – just plain evil no matter WHAT they are.
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Hmmm cleerly based on his jinormus size the skwirrel wuz condukting that orkestra by using intimidashun taktics like by crushing musishuns if they did not play rite! I does not think that is a very humane way to condukt an orkestra and so I wuld kwestshun wether that evel skwirrel majishun wuz trooly a patron of the arts.
Yer pal Dozer
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Khan woo believe it:
The Beatle Paul is going to skhore an animated thingie featuring a SKHWIRREL????!!!!????
That is furry skhary!
Hugz&Khysses,
Khyra
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We have loads of squirrels here. I’ve not seen one with a magic wand yet but I’ll be on the watch! We don’t have any walnut trees but do have oak and hickory. Hope he only likes walnuts then we’ll be safe from his evilness! Thanks for the warning!
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We came over after reading the comments on Mango’s blog about his part in the squirrel wars. What totally interesting data you have come up with on the evil squirrel wizard and the zombies he has created. I don’t know if he has gotten to this area of the country, but we are proudly fighting to keep ALL squirrels down in Corgi Country! OC and the Corgi Country Crew
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The more we learn about these tree rats, the worse it gets! We need a bigger army!
Feather, Darla, Pappy & LizzaBella ^..^
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Gosh, I’m glad we don’t have squirrels around here! they look horrifying, esp. the zombie squirrels. thanks for the warning!
love & wags,
River
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Squirrels are evil! I’m glad we don’t have any here!
Mochi
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and here i thought squirrels were cute…
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This one was a laugh riot, great post! Those squirrels will never know what hit them when Tucker comes to!
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Oh my goodness, Dennis – what are you on, to make up such creative posts?! I want some!! 🙂
Slobbers,
Honey the Great Dane
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think i saw that squirrel yesterday evading the relentless divebombing of an agitated blackbird. couldnt figure out who to root for/against
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Thank you for visiting Sasha
Anne
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Hello Dennis, this is hilarious stuff! Very nice to meet you. Thank you for stopping by our blog. We will certainly be visiting yours again. We had never heard of a vizsla dog, so we looked it up. Very handsome!
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Boy who’da though such evil could emanate from such cuteness
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omdog, I am going to my yard and seeing if he is out there right now. Maybe I can sell Tanner to him!
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Lol! We should all take a little time to appreciate the arts. Does evil squirrel sing too?
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