me vs the vakyoom kleener!!!

hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay wel as part of my ongoing projekt of self improovment i hav deesided that i am going to konker my feer of the vakyoom kleener!!! now as yoo ar probly aware vakyoom kleeners ar responsibul for menny terrifying tales and ledjends for instanse:

the lok ness vakyoom kleener monster
feroshus vakyoom kleener monsters looting a ship wot they hav rekd
the infamus vakyoom kleener invayzhun from mars

so as yoo can see vakyoom kleeners ar verry skarry and formidabul so overcoming my feer of them is a big step for me ok heer goze:

wel maybe i wil do it tomorro insted ha ha ok bye

33 thoughts on “me vs the vakyoom kleener!!!

  1. Oh Our Goodness we have the same fears! The beasty we have does not have a noes like yers.

    But it collects ar hairs and momma says its enough every time to make another dog!!! what!!!

    Bobo and Mejd


  2. It seems to me, given the evidence you so competently supply, that vakyoom kleeners are every bit as terrible as you fear, if not more. Why, then are you allowing your mama to handle it? Why do you even permit it in your HOUSE? Decry, I say. Sound out and protest. Destroy everything in the house, bark without ceasing, bay WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! Do not give up, Dennis. Do not allow yourself to be tyrannized by conformity.


  3. Dennis, Just so you know, you aren’t alone because I really really hate the vacuum cleaner too and usually I hide in the closet to stay away from it. It is evil! Your friend, Clover


  4. Dennis, I bet that thing has sharp teeth hidden in its mouth — probably best not to mess with it. My vote is to hide under the bed.



  5. Oh Dennis, be careful, those vacuum cleaners are sneaky and have a habit of sneaking up on a pup and THEN being switched on – they’re terrifying! We think you’re very brave – well, perhaps tomorrow you’ll be very brave at any rate, he he he! Schnauzer snuggles – JD and Max.


  6. My Mum’s dog loved the vacuum cleaner. She would sit in front of it and wait to have her fur vacuumed. I suppose she was a bit dim. I always wondered where vacuum cleaners came from. Thanks for the reveal!


  7. We aren’t great fans of the vacuum either. We have that purple dyson demon here to contend with. Mom seems to take great pleasure in using it daily and sometimes even more than once a day. We just beg to go outside or else hide in our crates. Can you believe Mom even uses it on our coats sometimes instead of a brush! Sheesh.

    Tail wags, the OP Pack


  8. Dennis
    That was excellent that you stayed in the same room as the hoover! I still cannot do that and need the back door open so I can get out and hide in the garden. What is very annoying for me is that Bailey sleeps right through and indeed mum has to hoover round about her!!!
    I hope one day to stay in the same room like you – even though I see you need your space.
    Martha xxx


  9. Oh Dennis, this is a slow process. I hate that thing and I am 18!!!
    It is so loud and mom can’t hear me calling her when she is shoving that thing around.
    What a dumb musheen


  10. Dennis-I don’t like that machine that cleans the floors and carpets either! But I attack it! Mom says I’ve killed 2 of them! I’m working on the 3rd!!! maybe you should try attacking it like I do!!!

    Woof Velcro


  11. Dennis the onlee way to kill the evel masheen is to atak it frum behind. If you kin git back there, chew its tail off and it will never move agin! Um but not wile its atached to the wall. Dont ask me how I know this.

    Yer pal Dozer


  12. This is a true story, Dennis, last summer before I new my Mom, she tripped over the vacuum cleaner HOSE, and dislocated her shoulder! Yes, and it took surgery and three months of physical therapy to get it back! So if I were you (and I’m glad I’m not) I would avoid this masheen at all costs! Don’t konker this fear, just go outside until its done. If your Mom wants to risk it for clean floors, nothing you can do, just take care of yourself. Thats what I do.



  13. You did pretty good, you were sort of in the same room. Give it another shot tomorrow. Try barking at it, and herding it, making smaller and smaller circles around it, pretty soon you will be so in the way, that you get to go outside every time its gonna get turned on. That’s what I did, now I never have to see it!
    your pal, Morgan


  14. You are so brave Dennis,

    Brave Sir Dennis ran away…(I didn’t)
    Bravely ran away,(I did not)
    When the vacuum cleaner reared it’s head,
    Dennis turned his tail & fled,(I never)
    Brave, brave, brave Sir Dennis ran away (it’s not true)


  15. Maybe I should be more careful. I never knew they were so dangerous.

    I like to lie down when I see that beast come out lest it suck up my Mango-ness from the carpet and Momma bangs the blasted thing right into me and says “move!” in her scary voice. What a jerk.

    Little pee-wee tries to see if he can make his tongue get sucked in.



  16. Denis-
    I never knew vacuums were water-dwelling creatures! Just one more reason to stay AWAY from the water… I hate the vacuum too, but to act out my fear I just attack it! Now my mom has started shooting me with a squirt gun if I do this, grrrrr.

    Sorry we don’t comment more – for some reason we can’t “follow” this blog like we do the others, so your new posts don’t update to our site & remind us to visit!! We’ll try to do better…

    Snorts – Brutus the Frenchie


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