hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay wel we hav got the antenna and raydeeo thing wurking in this chikkin koop spayship and i am abel to send bak messadjes frum owter spayse now so i thawt that the first thing i wood do wood be to file a skolarly and hili sientifik treetis on common miths abowt owter spayse i hope this will kleer sum things up for all those siense fizziks and astronomee tipes wot ar stuk bak on erth ok heer goze
mith number wun: spayse is ful of vakyooms
having ben heer sevral times i can tel yoo that spayse is not ful of vakyooms at al!!! in fakt it is ful of a hole lot of nuthing!!! i dont think their is eeven enny air up heer so their wood be nuthing for the vakyoom to pul in wich mayks this mith eeven sillier wen yoo think abowt it!!!
mith number too: spayse is ful of stars
now this is a mith wot is beleevd by just abowt evrybuddy and wuz popyoolarized by the faymus dokyoomentry 2001 ware the mayn karakter sez its ful of stars but reely yoo cannot trust the wurd of sumwun hoo has spent so mutch time debugging a kompyooter it mayks them a littel krazy!!! ennyway beleev me their ar no stars up heer other then tom krooze their is just a bunch of shiny littel wite dots wich i am pretty shoor ar like pinholes or sumthing in a big sheet of konstrukshun payper wot ar showing lite thats on the other side posibly coming frum a jiant lite bulb held in the mowth of an even more jiant turtel
mith number three: owr galaksee is ful of milky way bars
now this is jut another silly mith i meen how wood al theez milky way bars hav gottin into spayse in the first playse??? ennyway it is just as wel this mith is not troo becuz chokolat is not gud for dogs beesides their woodnt be mutch rum in spayse for milky way bars with all the skittels that ar floting arownd up heer
mith number fore: spayse is ful of invayders
now this mith is wot we like to call a paranoyd deloozhun wot is propagayted by the vast viddyo gayme and moovee industree konspeerasee in order to kreayt there own persunal armee of trigger happy gaymers and moovee goers hoo wil sumday rise up and destroy the eevil hejemony of the bord gaym and buk publishing industree however it is not troo their arnt all sorts of invayders in spayse becuz THEY AR ALREDDY ON ERTH!!!!!! shhhh dont let them no i told yoo that
mith number five: carl sagan is ded
he is not!!! he has just bekum wun with the kosmos!!!
mith number siks: spayse has ben kolonized by pigs
ummmm akchooaly this wun appeerz to be troo sorry folks i gess yoo wil hav to stay on erth becuz the pigs hav alreddy konkerrd the yooniverse!!!
all rite wel i see that i hav just abowt reetchd my bandwidth kap for the day so i must end this transmishun but i hope this skolarly treetis has disproovd sum miths and helpd all my nice reederz gayn a grater understanding of the vast and misteeryus yet ultimatly simpul and elegant wurkings of the cosmos!!! ok bye
The Oceanside Animals 
Dennis,
I anxiously await your next orbit over my estate so that I can learn more about outer space via my norse code communications device.
I am so glad that you have debunked those myths. Sadly, the humans cling to the familiar and you might want to be careful who you share your new found truths with lest you find yourself embroiled in government conspiracy trial or some such.
I am most curious about pigs in space. Is it possible that outer space is one big old barnyard what with the chicken planet as well?
Slobbers,
Mango
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pppiiiggggssss in spppppaaaaccceeee
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I think most of us have known there are pigs in space and have been for quite a while. I think I want to debunk your no vacuums in space too. Everytime the space station breaks a vacuum, they toss it out the window and after all these years of cleaning the space station, there are quite a few out there. Maybe you just missed them.
Kisses,
Stella
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I don’t know how long it took you to bring this informative post to fruition, but I’m amazed by all the erudite data I did not know about. (Tom Cruise – heeheh! – knew about that) – thanks for reporting, Dennis.
xo Sammie
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YAY for milky ways! My momster could eat a constellation full of those…!
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Let your imagination soar~~~~~ 🙂
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oh no no no this is not imadjinayshun!!! this is cold hard sientifik fakt!!! ok bye
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Dennis
Thank dog that you awe such a skolawly type and could debunk all these myfses fow us.
I had heawd most of them and I know all the gullibles believe them I’m sowt of glad that the
one about the piggies is twoo..they seem to be good at widing awound in theiw spaceships and I’m glad theat thewe is powk evewywhewe, even in space
smoochie kissesASTA
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Khwark…
Khwark…
Khwark…
Hugz&Khysses,
Khyra
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Thank you soooooo much for the myth clarification Dennis. I was really worried about the stars in space….But what about the wars in the stars??? Are there Star Wars out there in space????
Thank you smileys!
Dory
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awesome!
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We are just wondering where space is. He keeps saying there is a lot of space between Qannik’s ears so we keep shouting in his ears for you, but you have not answered back yet. All we hear are echos. Are you there?
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OH my God, I’m laughing so much from this post!!!! 😆
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This should be the main feature in Scientific American! Or on CNN at least. I love the way you debunk those silly miths.
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Space is full of a whole lot of nothing? It sounds an awful lot like Nebraska to me…. (And there are pigs in Nebraska, too. Hmmm… Maybe space doesn’t really exist, and all of your pictures are taken on a vacant sound lot in Nebraska…. Hmmm… I can’t think about this any more because I think my brain might explode.)
*kissey face*
-Fiona
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Geez, that Wikipedia is full of shit ! Thanks Dennis for the lesson 🙂 .
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🙂
I love it !!
Fantastic post.
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well that last truth bodes well for your pig powder!!
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Hi Dennis – wow, you’re so clever, is there anything you don’t know? We bet there isn’t! I mean, we’d always been a bit scared when it got dark because of all those hovering vacuum cleaners out there above our heads in that scary space place – thank you for clearing that up for us, we know we can go out on night time walks now without being so worried! You are great – how did you get so clever? Did you study or were you simply born with the smarts? Wow – we think you’re amazing! Yours admiringly – JD and Max.
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Dennis, do be careful. I hope you had your shots so you don’t get any space swine flu. Can you see my house from up there. I will go out tomorrow and put up a sign for you.
licks and sniffs, Sasha
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Thanks for clearing up those myths! 🙂
Mochi
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Bonjour Dennis , you are really my hero!
I think we can be safe now because you show what is happening around us. I was wondering how those pics are well fit inside so small plane!!!It’s amazing!
Mommy loves those “stars”! (Elle adores Tom Cruise!)
purrs and love
your friend Luna
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no milky ways???? you mean to tell me chocolate is endangered????????
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Pigs? Really? But they don’t have apposable thumbs!
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I hope you will be presenting this as your dog-torial thesis!
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1. I’d like a new vacuum. Bring me one?
2. If Borat is out there, I’m staying home.
3. Milky Way is one of my faves. Bring back a lot.
4. I do hope you brought your Joy Stick with you.
5. Carl Sagen, like Elivs, is not dead but has just gone home.
6. I also heard “The Great Gonzo” is really an alien.
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thanks for all that clarification Dennis. Hey if you get into trouble (hehehe) let me know and maybe I can help ou with my new found magical powers!
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You have cleared up so many mysteries for us
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I heard that the Milky Way is billions of years old. I’m glad you have proved that there are no Milky Ways out there because if it was true they’d be way past their use by date. Doraz said your imagination was sore. I hope it is feeling much better by now. Get well soon Dennis’s imagination
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This is a great post. Too bad there aren’t any milkyway bars in space. Do you think there are any twix bars though?
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I expect it was quite a bit of work to do? What I find interesting is how easy it is to read. One thing though. Maybe I missed it but you don’t seem to offer us any explanations of dark theory or string matter. Or is is stringy, dark, matter? Or dark, stringy, mats? Or… oh never mind. Funny post.
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Hey Dennis is it troo that it is turtles all the way down??
Yer pal Dozer
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