The Last Dogfighter

Having acquired bulk quantities of Diet Coke and Mentos, I am now ready to return to outer space aboard my fishing trawler the Orca for a final showdown with my arch-nemesis Darth Tater and his space station the Death Spud Star. Unfortunately, I did not count on the vastness of the Costco parking lot. I have now spent hours trying to find my vessel and am no closer than I was when I started. Perhaps next time I should put a flashing light on top of the mast. Little do I know, though, that my movements throughout the lot are being tracked by a mysterious vehicle and an even more mysterious observer …

Of course, with my superior senses, I detect that the car is following me even before it makes its approach, and prepare a response to the inevitable question before it comes.

My initial fear that this may be Doc Brown coming to yell at me again for disrupting the space-time continuum proves to be unfounded; instead, I find myself talking with a recruiter from some sort of elite group of space fighter pilots.

Centauri helps me tie my giant bottle of Diet Coke and my Mentos to the roof of his car, then invites me inside, where he makes his proposal and I, ruthless negotiator that I am, make mine.

Having thus come to an agreement, Centauri spirits me away from the Costco parking lot, heading off to the secret headquarters of the Rylan Star League, whatever that is, where I will learn to pilot the most state-of-the-art fighter ship in the galaxy!

So once again, we see that a great destiny awaits those who, like me, Dennis the Vizsla, never give up!

25 thoughts on “The Last Dogfighter

  1. Oh Dennis, one of these days you are gonna cause my mom to Laugh herself over the Rainbow Bridge. You are a Trip… in more ways than one!!!


  2. Darth Tater is, like, so fried now. No death spud can stand up to the power of diet coke and mentos. And now I gotta go buy popcorn and stuff. Be back shortly . . .


  3. Let’s just hope those Mentos and Diet Coke don’t get mixed up together before the big battle! Dennis, you’re one tough negotiator! Did you check the hatband to make sure it was your size? I have a feeling that you’re going to be doing a lot more work than what that hat is worth!


  4. Where is the beautiful Trixie? She is the only pet in your family with good sense and you should seek her advice always.

    Get with it, Dennis!



  5. oh my…I didn’t know, I swear…that diet coke could be so hypnotic! LOL
    Dennis, what a fantastic, outstanding, creative moment!
    I’m here sending you good vibrations, everything will be fine at the end…go boy!


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