THE FOLLOWING IS A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT
Hello stuffie friends. This is Green Sea Turtle. Like many other stuffies, I have seen numerous warnings about interacting with Dennis the Vizsla; but I never thought those warnings applied to me. After all, I have had a long history of positive interactions with dogs, as seen in these photos from the year 2004, when I was playing with my good friends Trixie and Tucker.
As you can see, I was so new in those days that I still had a sticker on my back saying where my squeaker was. Ah, good times. Even as horror stories began to emerge about the marauding Dennis the Vizsla, I thought I would be invulnerable to his stuffie-slaughtering ways because of my protective carapace. Unfortunately, I was wrong; because after a particularly frustrating day attempting to find the nonexistent bacon dimension, Dennis came to me and told me that I needed to make some changes in my life.
Now, you may be thinking that Dennis was trying to tell me to be more extroverted, less of a wallflower. But you are wrong.
Terribly, terribly wrong.
So remember, stuffie friends …
… if it seems like Dennis is trying to help you …
… it just means that you are next on his list of stuffies to dismember.
Thank you and good day.