Die Hard With Opossum

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Norman #1: “I disabled the wi-fi Norman.”
Norman #2:”Good work, Norman.”
Ron Burgundy: “This situation has gotten very, very serious.”
Producer Smurf: “No smurfing, really?”
Ron Burgundy: “Yes. I can’t post to Instagram or Twitter or live-stream to Facebook.”
Mouse: “Say, who’s the new ninja hedgehog?”
Ninja Hedgehog Commander: “That’s Norman. He has a cannon on his head.”
Mouse: “Really? Are you sure he didn’t just get his face stuck in a toilet paper roll?”
Ninja Hedgehog Commander: “Silence!”
Opossum (thinking from inside air shaft): “HISSS! Come to the coast, there’ll be a debate, we’ll have a few laughs …”

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The World Stage

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Russian Hacker: “Lord Putin, as you commanded, we have conducted a massive DDoS strike against the American internet, yet news of the dog’s faux paw continues to spread.”
Vladimir Putin: “I want that dog in the White House. Stage an attack to generate sympathy for him.”
Russian Hacker: “As you command, Lord Putin. By the way, did you see what we did there? ‘Faux paw’? Are we not so very clever?”
Vladimir Putin: “Yes. You are hilarious. Now if you will excuse me, I am about to crack some eggs so that my short order cook can make me an omelet.”

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(Somewhat) Wordless Wednesday: Magic Carpet Ride

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Dada’s note: Dennis’s chest X-rays came back inconclusive, with “questionable nodular opacity in the ventral thorax” and mild heart enlargement,while the ultrasound showed evidence of a chordae tendineae rupture.  So basically, we still don’t really know exactly why he’s been coughing; it could even be down to seasonal allergies from weeds sprouting after the one or two days when it rained a few weeks ago.  The cardiologist does think that the medication is helping to relieve the pressure on Dennis’s heart, though.  His next recheck will be in a few months, at which time he may be starting on another medication, depending on how things look then.

Clown Hall Debate

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Russian Hacker: “Lord Putin, per your instructions, we have modified the instant poll software for the American Presidential debate.”
Vladimir Putin: “Excellent. Now leave me alone with my Precious for a bit. I just fished it out of the lava pool into which some fool dropped it.”

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