a skolarly treetis on how the gofers tried to destroy my howse!!!

hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay wile evrywun wuz distrakted by nitemarez and elekshuns and wotnot it seems that the gofers or sumbuddy tuk the oppertoonity to try to destroy my howse or at leest my yard chek it owt!!!

smurf bunker!!! now with missile silo!!!

so the first thing they did is they dug up arownd this cement bunker thing owt by the street!!! i am not shoor wot the cement bunker wuz for it is rather small for serviving the zombee apokalips so i suspect that maybe my frenemy the smurf bilt it as his own privat hideaway ware he can ride owt enny misfortchoons or end of the wurld events wot mite okkur!!! but unfortchoonatly it evidently provided a starting poynt for the gofer attak on akkownt of they chood thru the cheep plastik peeveesee piping wot the smurf installd!!! see wot happens wen yoo kut korners smurf??? thats rite this is wot happens!!!

they sprayd mud and water all over my nice kleen sidewawk!!!

now it may seem like ok fine the gofers ar digging up the smurfs batchelor pad big deel!!! but that is not all they did they also dug a trentch towards the howse!!! the howse wot i liv in!!!

i kan see my howse frum heer!!! up the trentch!!!
i kan see my howse frum heer!!!

as yoo kan see the gofers hav riggd up sum kind of ark welding pipe thing konnekted wot is konnekted to sum kind of hose thing konnekted to the howse!!!

silly gofers forgot to kover there tunnel!!!

they eeven tunneld underneeth the sidewawk!!! no dowt to rig up sum kind of spring loded booby trap to shoot dogs and peepul into the air wen wawking over it!!!

under the sidewawk!!! owt of the sun!!!

and as if that wuz not bad enuf they opened up another trentch too trying to ensirkle the bak of the howse!!! as if they thawt they cud trap us all inside or sumthing!!!

so as yoo kan see those eevil gofers shoor hav gawn to a lot of truble trying to attak the howse!!! but their is sumwun wot they did not kownt on!!!


Dennis: “I used to bullseye womp rats in my T-16 back home.  They’re not much bigger than gophers.”
Mouse: “You never did any such thing.”
Mr. Nibbles: “Use the Force, Mr. Dennis!”
Dennis: “What are you two doing in my X-Wing?”

yes thats rite!!! this gofer assawlt on my howse and my sidewawk and wotever the hek those wite pipes ar wil not stand!!! into the trentch we go!!!

whew that wuz klose that gofer almost got me with his invisibul laser gun!!! but he wuz no match for my awsum vizsla reflekses and flying skilz!!!  and so the yard wuz sayved frum the gofer attak the only trayse left beeing the hole they kut in the hedj!!! wel and also sum dirt but the yard wuz alreddy mostly dirt ennyway ha ha ha!!!


and now that the thret is ended if yoo wil ekskyooz me i am going to go tayk a nap!!! ok bye

The End … Or Is It … ?


16 thoughts on “a skolarly treetis on how the gofers tried to destroy my howse!!!

  1. OMGoodness, D the V. I have never seen so many scary things in one post in my life. Your family is in good paws with you on the job, but the cauldron, buddy…. That could prove to be more than you were banking on…. Good luck.

    Love and licks,

    Liked by 1 person

  2. OH NO….Looks like those gophers have rigged up some kind of submersion device, Dennis…WATCH OUT!!!!

    Dory, Jakey, Bilbo and Mayor Elect Arty

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh those goofers are there now, must be the same we had here, everything is digged. I really understand you, they were here on out tiny alley two summers.They killed two birches in our yard. The alley is now higher on the other side, and full of holes and they forgot here aii the garbage they made.
    And an important announcement:
    Dear Dennis,
    we have nominated you for The Versatile Blogger Award. Visit our blog, please.
    Kosmo, mom, and mom´s husband.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Hello Dennis… it’s US.. Frankie and Ernie the Dachshunds… OMD OMD Dennis… this is NOT a good situation.. Not Good at all… that BOIL and BUBBLE Double the Trouble Cauldron is SCARY… OMD OMD… better call in some Reinforcements… OK Bye

    Liked by 1 person

  5. WOW! All that work digging up a trench. I could have helped my friends. I’ve been told I have a powerful snout – just ask mom – snorts with piggy laughter. And OMP – you’re little groundhog/gopher guy at the end of your movie – hilarious!! Happy Monday friends. XOXO – Bacon


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