We Don’t Need ANTother Hero


Vermin: “HISSS! I suppose you’re all wondering why I called this meeting.”
Mouse: “Actually, I’m wondering how you called this meeting. I have your account blocked from scheduling the conference room.”
Vermin: “Oh I gave the stoner dog a bag of Doritos and he let me use his account to book the room.”

Mouse: “Spicoli?”
Spicoli: “Yes, dude?”
Mouse: “Did you let Vermin use your account in exchange for a bag of Doritos?”
Spicoli: “Dude, come on. I know the rules about not sharing our accounts.”
Mouse: “That’s not exactly a denial.”
Mr. Nibbles: “Why did you call this meeting, Ms. Vermin?”
Vermin: “HISS! We need to do something about the ants.”
Chaplin: “I thought you wanted them around so you could eat them.”
Charlee: “You said ants were delicious protein.”
Vermin: “That was before they took the remote while my stories were on.”

Dennis: “Producer Smurf wanted to be in charge of finding someone to take care of the ants. We’re just waiting on him.”
Vermin: “HISSS! What?! The only thing I would put that nasty blue nerd in charge of is wearing stupid footie pants. And he’s not even good at that!”
Chaplin: “What are these ‘stories’ that you’re so worried about missing?”
Vermin: “It’s mostly nasty humans being mean to each other. I don’t think they know they’re being filmed. I like to watch them to get pointers on how to behave.”
Mr. Nibbles: “Do you mean daytime soap operas?”
Vermin: “HISS! I don’t think so. There’s no soap and not much singing.”
Spicoli: “Dude, I’m hurt that you think I would break the account rules for a bag of Doritos.”
Mouse: “Still not a denial. And I see you do have a bag of Doritos there.”
Spicoli: “What, these? I got these at the store.”

Mouse: “This bag has a big tag on it.”
Spicoli: “It was a tag sale.”
Mouse: “The tag says ‘HISSSS! Thank you for the use of your password. Signed, Vermin.”
Spicoli: “All right, all right, you got me, Great Mouse Detective. But who cares if the possum used my account to book the conference room?”
Mouse: “Nobody, really. The question is, what else did Vermin do while she was logged in as you?”
Producer Smurf: “I’m back! And wait until you see the smurfy lineup of contestants I got for the anti-ant show! Somebody roll the demo tape!”

Momentarily …

Television: “Four conestANTS enter! But only ONE can be the TerminANTor! It’s time to up the ANTe for the Martian ANThunter, Adam ANT, ANTi-ANTity, and the Pink pANTher! It’s … MAD ANTS: BEYOND SUGARDOME!”
Producer Smurf: “I had to change some of their names because they were stupid.”
Charlee: “The Pink Panther is my favorite!”
Chaplin: “Mine too!”
Vermin: “HISSS! I take it back. This is going to be epic.”
RIAA Enforcer: “I have a warrant for one ‘awesomeshadesdude’ for illegally downloading 400 copies of the K-Tel album Every Song About Opossums Ever Recorded.”
Mouse: “See?”

13 thoughts on “We Don’t Need ANTother Hero

  1. dorysbackyard says:

    I think for the first time we are going to have to agree with that Vermin Possum Kitty and say this is going to be an epic battle!
    xoxo,
    Jakey, Arty & Rosy

    Like

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