Troll Talk

troll_talk_1

Troll: “Hør, katt, jeg er mye større enn deg, så når jeg ber deg om å gjøre noe, bør du gjøre det.”*
Producer Smurf: “This isn’t smurfy! It isn’t smurfy at all! Get me out of here!”
Chaplin: “Why do you want us to get you out of your pants?”
Lulu: “So far this trip has been very informative about the differences between cats and trolls. Trolls are apparently much bigger than cats.”
Spicoli: “Good observation, dude. Have you learned any other differences between them?”

troll_talk_2

Troll: “Hei katt! Jeg snakker til deg!”**
Producer Smurf: “It’s so hot and stuffy in here! And this troll fur smells like somebody smurfed a yak into a gym sock and then boiled it in cabbage juice!”
Chaplin: “Are you sure that smell is the troll fur? I mean, they are your pants …”
Lulu: “No, that’s it so far.”
Spicoli: “Hmm okay. Well I have to say you’re handling this adventure pretty well.”

troll_talk_3

Troll: “Katt! Følg med!”***
Producer Smurf: “Are you smurfing that I smell like a yak smurfed into a gym sock and boiled in cabbage juice?!”
Chaplin: “All I’m saying is that you’ve been wearing those same pants the entire time I’ve known you. They’ve had a lot more time to smell like you than to smell like a troll.”
Lulu: “I am?”
Spicoli: “Dude, there’s a giant hairy thing over there shouting in a language nobody but the cat understands, and up until a few minutes ago it didn’t even have pants on. Some might consider that five-alarm freak-out material.”
Lulu: “Oh. Well, you know, it has hands, and hands mean belly rubs, so I’m not too worried about it.”

troll_talk_4

Producer Smurf: “I DO NOT SMURF LIKE A YAK IN A GYM SOCK BOILED IN CABBAGE JUICE!”
Chaplin: “Now you’re getting awfully defensive.”
Spicoli: “Dude. You couldn’t possibly accept a belly rub from that thing. Its fingernail is bigger than your whole body.”
Lulu: “Belly rubs are belly rubs.”
Troll: “Wow, jeg har aldri blitt ignorert sånn før. Herlig, her kommer Ragnar, troll-moteplaten.”****

troll_talk

Troll: “Hei Ragnar.”*****
Ragnar: “Hei. Hva har du på deg?”******
Troll: “Slår meg. De dukket nettopp opp.”*******
Producer Smurf: “They’re pants!  They’re my pants! And you should smurf them off immediately!”
Spicoli: “Noooo! Dude! Do not listen to the talking pants! Chaplin, tell the troll to leave the talking pants on!”
Chaplin: “I don’t know Norwegian so I can talk to trolls. I know Norwegian so I can ignore trolls. Big difference.”


* “Listen, cat, I’m much bigger than you, so when I ask you to do something, you should do it.”
** “Hey cat! I’m talking to you!”
*** “Cat! Pay attention!”
**** “Wow, I’ve never been ignored like that before. Oh great, here comes Ragnar, the troll fashion plate.”
***** “Hey Ragnar.”
****** “Hey. What are you wearing?”
******* “Beats me. They  just appeared.”

9 Comments on “Troll Talk

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