Overheard Around The Conference Room

Lulu: “I suppose you’re all wondering why I called this meeting.”
Producer Smurf: “I was already here smurfing the Smurfs movie for the smurfteenth time.”
Charlee: “We were batting a ball around and it rolled in here.”
Vermin: “HISS! I’m not here because you called me. I was sleeping in the recessed lights and when you turned them on it heated up my tuchus a little.”
Spicoli: “Oh, so that’s why it smells funny in here?”

Producer Smurf: “They smurfed me to the direct the movie but I smurfed them no. I smurfed them it was way too commercial for me. I’m an artist, not a hack.”
Spicoli: “There I lit some patchouli incense. That’ll cover up the roasted opossum smell.”
Mouse: “You’re not actually fooling anyone, Spicoli.”
Spicoli: “I have no idea what you’re talking about, dude.”
Lulu: “Didn’t anyone come here because of me calling a meeting? Don’t you ever look at the shared calendar?”
Chaplin: “If you want us to pay attention to the calendar you need to liven it up a little. Maybe hang a few feathers off it.”
Mr. Nibbles: “I looked at the calendar, Miss Lulu.”

Mouse: “I looked at the calendar too, Lulu, but I must have missed the meeting request what with all the entries for “sleep under the bed” and “chase squirrels” and “get belly rubs”.
Lulu: “It’s important to prioritize tasks on your calendar.”
Producer Smurf: “Plus, you know, I was too busy to get involved in their stupid movie.”
Charlee: “Too busy doing what?”
Producer Smurf: “Vanity Smurf had smurfed me to film him staring at himself in the mirror for a month.”
Chaplin: “That sounds pretty epic.”
Producer Smurf: “Yeah, I hoped it would smurf some awards, but—”
Chaplin: “Epically boring! Burn!”
Vermin: “HISS! Stoner dog! Shut off your smoke machine! It’s getting in my eyes! This isn’t a Pink Floyd concert!”
Spicoli: “Ooh! Dude! Good call!”

Lulu: “All right, this meeting is getting way off track. So the reason I called it is because of this voice mail I found on Dada’s phone. Here’s the transcription so you can all read it yourselves.”

Vermin: “HISS! I was not saying you should make it a Pink Floyd concert.”
Spicoli: “Of course that’s what you were saying.”
Lulu: “So what do you think? It says some random person is our CEO. This seems like something we should investigate, right?”
Mr. Nibbles: “I think we should have been issued safety goggles for this meeting.”
Mouse: “I think it seems like something Dennis would have investigated.”
Lulu: “Does that mean yes?”
Mouse: “It means I assume you won’t listen to me if I say no.”

9 thoughts on “Overheard Around The Conference Room

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