My Birdyguard

Lulu: “So phase one of your plan is to stack the toupees in a little pyramid?”
Mouse: “Well, that’s just to get them out of Spicoli’s van, since he apparently has urgent business to attend to.”
Spicoli: “That’s right, dude. Time is money, and money is Doritos, therefore time is Doritos.”
Chaplin: “Since when does a lizard hire a giant bird as a bodyguard?”
Lizard: “Since I made a fortune in SmurfCoin, that’s when! Go on, Blue, beat up this mean cat for me!”
Blue: “Okay, but first I’m going to need you to smurf another 0.00230123 SmurfCoin to my SmurfCoin wallet.”
Lizard: “*SIGH* Fine. Cat, can you wait around for the transfer to finish so that Blue over there can beat you up afterwards?”
Chaplin: “Uh, sure, I guess.”

Producer Smurf: “Poet Smurf, let it be smurfed that 0.00230123 SmurfCoin are being smurfed from 334BC1B3F47D70726 to B244015DE54B8F3F6 at an exchange rate of one SmurfCoin to $17,000,000, starting now.”
Poet Smurf: “I am smurfing down the transaction as we speak. Please wait for the transaction to finish before smurfing any further action related to the transfer.”
Blue: “Standing by.”
Spicoli: “Hey, dude, you and your pet lizard aren’t scratching up the finish on my van with your little claws, are you?”
Chaplin: “My claws are fully retracted at the moment. I can’t speak for what the lizard is doing. Also, he’s not my pet, he’s just a toy.”
Lizard: “I’m not a toy! I’m a SmurfCoin billionaire! I could by and sell hundreds of this truck and I’ll scratch it up if I feel like it!”
Lulu: “Now there are two toupee pyramids.”
Charlee: “Won’t someone think of the cat cups? Where will I nap once they’re full of toupees?!”
Mouse: “I put out a call to somebody I know who might be able to wrangle them out of here for us. You might call him a Pied Piper.”

Producer Smurf: “Poet Smurf, please smurf that the exchange rate of SmurfCoin has just smurfed and is now one SmurfCoin to $0.006.
Poet Smurf: “So smurfed.”
Lizard: “Wait, what? How could that happen? How does this exchange rate get set?”
Poet Smurf: “Oh we just smurf it out of our hats.”
Blue: “Sorry, your SmurfCoin payment is now insufficient to cover bodyguard services. Enjoy the rest of your day.”
Chaplin: “Prepare to get tossed around in the air again for a while.”
Owen: “Wow, this is the worst infestation I’ve ever seen.”
Lulu: “Uh-oh. Bagpipes.”
Charlee: “Are you sure this isn’t going to be a case of the cure being worse than the disease?”
Mouse: “Desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Spicoli: “So, dude, I heard you might have pie?”

8 thoughts on “My Birdyguard

  1. We stopped getting notifications of your busy lives, Charlee, Chaplin and Lulu, and we feel like we missed a lot leading up to this. It sure looks like there was a lot of confusion and never trust anything but hard (or soft), cold (or warm) dog (or cat) food. XOX Lucy and Xena

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