Technology News Today

Ron Burgundy: “Massive outages continue to ripple across the Internet as more and more bandwidth and processing power is claimed by dictionary services SpellRadar and SiteCheck. This was the scene today as one of SpellRadar’s data centers erupted in flames, apparently as a result of its attempt to grind through the massive number of spelling errors in an as-yet-unidentified web site.”

Spicoli: “Hey, dudes, is something wrong with the wi-fi?”
Lulu: “The wi-fi? No, um, the wi-fi is working just fine. Why?”
Ron Burgundy: “In other news, someone here at the studio keeps cooking fish tacos in the microwave. I will find you, and I will destroy you.”

Spicoli: “I’m trying to stream ‘Gossip Girl’ and it won’t stop buffering.”
Vermin: “HISSS! Nasty dog and cats! What did you do to the Internet? My VPN to the mealworm vats isn’t working!”
Lulu: “Why do you need a VPN to the mealworm vats? It’s not like you can churn them remotely.”
Ron Burgundy: “Arthur Bach became the latest billionaire in space when the excessive quantity of bubbles in his bathtub caused it to detach from his penthouse apartment and float up to a height of nearly 50 miles. Mr. Bach was able to land safely after deploying a parachute that he keeps in his top hat.”

Ron Burgundy: “After the break, noted crank FBI agent Fox Mulder is in the studio to say ‘I told you so!’ about unidentified flying objects. Can he help me track down who is cooking the fish tacos? Stay tuned to find out!”
Spicoli: “It’s too noisy here. I’m going to go see if I can stream it at Starbucks.”
Vermin: “HISSS! Clearly you have not been keeping up on the latest in mealworm vat churning technology. Don’t they ever talk about it on this show?”
Lulu: “Uh, no, no they don’t.”
Producer Smurf: “What the smurf is smurfing on with the Internet? I was just Skyping with Papa Smurf and we got disconnected!”
Chaplin: “He probably just hung up on you.”

11 thoughts on “Technology News Today

  1. This toetallee xplaness why our Inttynet iss all screwy this week!!! Thanx fore lettin us know. LadyMew was gonna call our Inntynet purrvider, mew mew mew…..
    **purrss** BellaDharma an ((huggiess)) LadyMew

    Pee S: Spicolo you look FAB inn yore shadess! 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Oh, dear the internet was out here, too for a while this morning…shucks…something strange is happening…do ya think our tech head menfolk here might be able to help figure it out? One of them is a computer engineer…or maybe HE is trying to take it over.

    Like

  3. So we guess that TV isn’t working from the internet. Good thing.Do all your mobile phones work? Do you HAVE mobile phones? If so, we are all going to be jealous. XOX Xena and Lucy

    Like

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