CSI: The Safari Park

Horatio Caine: “So this is where your friend Blue is right now?”
Lulu: “Yes, she posted that she was here visiting relatives.”
Horatio Caine: “Well, it shouldn’t be too hard to find her in the closed confines of an animal park.”

Seven hours of wandering around later …

Horatio Caine: “You’re a difficult bird to find, Blue.”
Blue: “I’m not a bird, I’m a velociraptor. Birds are my distant descendants.”
Horatio Caine: “Be that as it may, I have a few questions for you about the—”
Lulu: “Wait, before we get into the questions, what is that incredible reek?”

Blue: “Oh that’s the flamingos. Their enclosure is just about the stinkiest place in the park.”
Lulu: “I see. Horatio, maybe you can carry on without me for a bit?”
Horatio Caine: “Uh, sure.”

Horatio Caine: “So I hear you like to eat things.”
Blue: “I do like to eat things.”
Horatio Caine: “Any chance you were eating a bird in the backyard the other day?”
Blue: “Well as I said, birds are my distant descendants. So that would be like eating one of my kids.”
Horatio Caine: “And you would never eat one of your kids, is that what you’re saying?”
Blue: “No, I would totally eat as many of my kids as I could catch. But I wouldn’t let their delicious feathers go to waste.”
Lulu: (rolling around in the flamingo enclosure)
Producer Smurf: “Lulu! I’m smurfing a true crime smurfcast and smurfumentary here, not ‘Girls Gone Smurf’!”

Lulu: “Ahh, that was a nice roll in the flamingo pen! So what did you and Blue talk about?”
Horatio Caine: “Well, Blue said she … *COUGH* … She said she … *COUGH COUGH*”

Lulu: “Horatio? Are you all right?”
Horatio Caine: “The stench! The stench!”
Blue: “I call dibs on eating him if he doesn’t get up in a few minutes.”
Producer Smurf: “I sure hope my smurfability insurance covers this …”