Category: Scams

Do You Feel Lucky?

Dada’s Note: Literally the day we were going to make the call, Dennis suddenly bounced back, happily greeting us at the door with a wagging tail for the first time in days. Whether this is an effect of increased prednisone and his new biome…

Jokers Wild

Dennis: “Charlee! Chaplin! What are you doing in the mythical land of Hungary?” Chaplin: “We’re here to bring you back home to California!” Felix Leiter:”Those cats have some sharp-looking tuxedos.”

Point/Counter Point

Dennis: “Hello there! My name is Dennis the human person and I am here with my guinea pig/St. Bernard mix, which is my human person pet.” Mouse: “Mr. Nibbles, why are you going along with this when you know it’s going to be a…

Overheard Around The House And Elsewhere

Vermin: “HISSS! I don’t know why they brought in these kittens when there’s already a perfectly good grey and white cat hanging around.” Mouse: “But, ‘Dennis’, I don’t see a grey and white ‘cat’ anywhere. Do you?” Charlee: “A talking field mouse. / A…

Overheard Around The Dungeon In The American Embassy

Bugs Bunny: “So what are you in for this time, Doc?” Dennis: “Well I accidentally smuggled a box of uninspected meat and a crate containing some sort of alien monster into the country.”

It’s A Blast

Dennis: “I don’t see why my box of meat has to be in the blast chamber. It’s just meat.” Ambassador: “Bob said so and Bob is the expert.” Vermin: “HISSS! Stupid big dog! Why are you complaining? If the crate has a bomb in…

Embassytown

Ambassador: “Welcome to the American Embassy, Mr. Vizsla and, uh, whatever that other thing is.” Dennis: “I was kind of hoping we would end up at the Blogville embassy …” Vermin: “HISSS! Nasty diplomat! I am a vizsla too! Can’t you tell by my…

Teen Point Five Million

Vermin: “HISSS! I’m not sure I’m entirely comfortable traveling over all this water on a heavily laden  magic flying coaster.” Dennis: “Oh it’s fine! I’ve only got one more stop to make and I don’t think it’s very far.” Vermin: “HISSS! All right, good!…

The Chicago Way

Dennis: “There sure is a lot of whooping and clanging going on back at the bank.” Vermin: “HISSS! Oh it’s just the cops. Nothing to worry about. Where are we going next?” Dennis: “Chicago. Dada has an unclaimed box full of money in a…

Have Some Big Cash

Dennis: “Okay, here we are in Washington, DC! Now what do we do?” Vermin: “HISSS! Now we get your money, silly dog! Just give me your photo ID and I will go inside and get to work.” Dennis: “I haven’t got a photo ID….

Observed Around The House

Mouse: “Dennis, why do you have your mama’s laptop?” Dennis: “Well since we’ve had a lot of extra expenses lately with my surgery and my heart and stuff, I thought I’d try to help out by earning some green papers again.” Mouse: “What do…

WD-40oz To Freedom

K9: “Doctor, Dennis is here with the device you wanted to examine.” Ninth Doctor: “Thank you, K9. Good dog.” Dennis: “Aaaaaiiiiieee! Loud! Loud! Lou―hey, is that food?”

Die Hard With Opossum

Norman #1: “I disabled the wi-fi Norman.” Norman #2:”Good work, Norman.” Ron Burgundy: “This situation has gotten very, very serious.” Producer Smurf: “No smurfing, really?” Ron Burgundy: “Yes. I can’t post to Instagram or Twitter or live-stream to Facebook.” Mouse: “Say, who’s the new…

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