to rantcho gwakkamoley!!! now in 3d!!!

hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay wel after reesent eevents mama and dada dekreed that we all needed to git owt of the howse beefore small animal klayms kort gets bak in seshun and so we bundeld owrselvs off to neerby rantcho gwakkamoley home of the faymus kampgrownd dumpsters plus this time data brawt along a 3d adapter for his iphone wot his dada sent him as a serprize prezzent so wot duz that meen??? that meenz pikchers ware if yoo kross yore eyez and dot yore teez yoo kan see me and trixie in three dimenshuns chek it owt!!!

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Having completed our astronaut training, our little band of spacefarers is preparing to depart the Earth with our load of Pop Rocks and soda in a desperate attempt to blow up the asteroid that threatens to destroy our planet. But before we go, we have time to stop by the conference room to watch the President address the nation, and indeed the world, to provide a much-needed dose of hope and reassurance.

Continue reading “Deepageddon”

New Labor-Saving Device Available!

Greetings, people who have kitchens! Are you tired of always having to wash your kitchen towels, only to have them get dirty again the very next day? Are you constantly having to take one towel down and put another one in its place? Well we have a solution for you — the Vizsl-A-Matic 9000! This miraculous new device is always on the job! As soon as its patented, ultra-sensitive air sniffing device detects that your kitchen towels have accumulated food residue, it will detach from its charging base (the Vizsl-A-Lap, sold separately) and lick into action. Before long your towels will be perfectly clean. You’ll never struggle with armloads of dirty kitchen towels again!

The Vizsl-A-Matic 9000 comes with a variety of attachments, enabling it to get into those hard-to-reach nooks and crannies and give them the most thorough cleaning they’ve had in years! Besides kitchen towels, the Vizsl-A-Matic 9000 works on:

  • Countertops!
  • Dining room tables!
  • Kitchen sinks!
  • Pantries & cabinets!
  • Garbage cans!
  • Refrigerators!
  • Ovens and ranges! (Must be cool first — very important!)
  • Dishes, bowls, and cups!
  • That space under the dishwasher where mysterious stuff accumulates and never gets cleaned up!

So don’t delay, get your Vizsl-A-Matic 9000 today, and leave the cleaning to us!

The Vizsl-A-Matic Hard At Work*

* Aerosmith soundtrack sold separately