Tag: bruce willis

Dog Hard

Having unexpectedly encountered my old and long-presumed-deep-fried nemesis, Darth Tater, our spaceship has found itself surrounded by superior forces, cut off from outside assistance, and about to be boarded. It looks like I will spend the rest of my days as a prisoner of Darth Tater, perhaps an exhibit in his petting zoo; but as the rest of the crew files out on deck to be clapped in chains, Harry Stamper grabs my collar and pulls me into one of the air ducts. Crazy at it seems, he thinks we have a chance against Tater and his minions. Even crazier, he tells me to start calling him John McClane.

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Dog Impact

Having achieved orbit and rendezvoused with the shuttle, we are now prepared to travel to the outer limits of the solar system and destroy the Alaska-sized asteroid that threatens to obliterate all life on earth. Our precious payload of Pop Rocks and soda is the only thing standing between our planet and a deep impact.

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Dogageddon

Having returned in triumph from Little China, I am expecting to be given a new assignment in my new position as a paranormal investigator; but instead I find the university abuzz with news of impending planetary disaster. The astronomers in our physics department have discovered a giant asteroid heading straight for earth. An emergency meeting has been called to figure out how to avert this catastrophe; and of course, with my stellar track record of beating insurmountable odds, they want me to be involved. Can we save the world? I hope so — all my stuff is there! If we succeed, we will be heroes; if we fail, it will be … Armageddon.

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Only Six?

Now that I have cleverly dealt with that ghost who wanted to marry my sister Trixie, I am able to once again resume my duties around the university. My office is still being rebuilt after the Ghostbusters incident, and I am told that the Department of Automotive Studies needs my temporary office space back, so I have been moved yet again, this time to the Department of Parapsychology. Ironically enough, this is where they study, among other things, ghosts.

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