Having acquired bulk quantities of Diet Coke and Mentos, I am now ready to return to outer space aboard my fishing trawler the Orca for a final showdown with my arch-nemesis Darth Tater and his space station the Death Spud Star. Unfortunately, I did not count on the vastness of the Costco parking lot. I have now spent hours trying to find my vessel and am no closer than I was when I started. Perhaps next time I should put a flashing light on top of the mast. Little do I know, though, that my movements throughout the lot are being tracked by a mysterious vehicle and an even more mysterious observer …
Tag: diet coke
Battle Beyond The Costco
Having escaped from the planet of the Orzo Outlaws, and with a pocket full of space credits courtesy of the Man With No Name, I am now ready to purchase a load of Mentos and Diet Coke from the nearest Costco and then destroy Darth Tater’s terrible Death Spud or Spud Star or whatever it’s called. All I have to do is pop in and out of Costco and be on my way; the Death Spud Star will be mashed potatoes by dinner time. Or will it … ?
Having turned the tables on bounty-hunting Pug Masterson, my friend the Man With No Name is once again in control of his own destiny, as am I. Much as I would love to stay and further study the history and aftermath of the Rice Wars, I have unfinished business in space. To my surprise, the Man With No Name offers his assistance in getting me back there; it turns out he has been secretly building a launching pad, with the intent to leave this world behind and find another one, a world where you can have rice or orzo or both and no one thinks anything of it. The name of this Utopian planet? Earth.