Aragorn: “We must fly to mighty Caradhras, where we shall find snow and death in equal abundance.”
Lulu: “All right! Um, what is Caradhras?”
Aragorn: “It is a great and terrible mountain!”
Java Bean: “Hey, a mountain! Lulu, that’s just where the mouse said we should go!”
Aragorn: “Your friend must be very wise. Why do they call him the mouse?”
Lulu: “Because he is literally a mouse.”
Aragorn: “Oh. Perhaps Radagast knows him then.”
Java Bean: “Hey, Lulu, I think I see snow in Hollywood.”
Lulu: “Oh, you sweet summer pup, that’s just cocaine.”
Mouse: “I strongly suggest just heading up to the mountains instead of going all the way to Death Valley.”
Lulu: “What do you think? Mountains, or Death Valley?”
Java Bean: “Well, I mean, the mouse is supposed to be el inteligente, so …”
Dada’s Note: This is from several months ago, after Bean’s dangling rear dewclaws were removed surgically when one of them became inflamed and before they had the opportunity to be removed traumatically. Being a spry young thing, he healed up quickly and was not in the cone for very long. His ability to shred paper and cardboard was not affected at all during the recovery period.
Mouse: “So how did it go with the playing in the snow in the back yard?”
Lulu: “You were right. No snow there.”
Mouse: “Well that’s a shame. Maybe you can get your Mama and Dada to take you up to the mountai—”
Lulu: “I think maybe our elevation is too high. I need to go somewhere lower than sea level.”
After doing a little research …
Lulu: “Anybody up for a road trip to Death Valley?”
Charlee: “We like to avoid places that have ‘Death’ in the name.”
Java Bean: “I’ll go!”
Lulu: “Oh boy! Snow at low elevations!”
Mouse: “I’m pretty sure they aren’t referring to sea level.”
Lulu: “Of course they are. Elevations don’t get much lower than this. I’m going to go outside and play in it!”
Momentarily …
Lulu: “Well this is disappointing.”
Java Bean: “¡Oye, Lulu! Come check out this bug I just peed on!”
Lulu: “… And then the red panda escaped while the ninja was tossing her cookies!”
Chaplin: “A ninja who tosses cookies? What flavor were they?”
Lulu: “Umm, vomit flavor I guess? I was a little busy rolling around.”
Ninja: “I said, Have you seen an escaped red panda around here?”
Lulu: “Ummm, why, did you lose one?”
Red Panda: “… 2 … 1 … Zero!”
Lulu: “Can we, uh, can we help you?”
Ninja: “Mmmf mmf mfmfmm mmphhhpm.”
Red Panda: “Uh-oh, a ninja.”
The Oceanside Animals 