hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay as yoo may hav herd i hav ben going for pst treetments now i no wot yoo may be saying to yoreself yoo may be saying to yoreself self wot ar pst treetments??? wel seeing as i am now an ekspert on the matter i am heer to eksplayn it to yoo!!! now of korse the pst is the file format wot is yoozed by the notoryus bloteware mikrosoft owtluk evidently i hav sumthing rong with my pst file so the first thing we need to do is vizzit mikrosofts web site to reed up on how to repayr the inboks or better yet just git rid of owtluk and yooze sumthing els like mozilla thunderburp (ha ha ha thunderburp that is wot i do after i eet) to reed yore eemayl insted of — wot??? oh dada sez i am tawking abowt a kompleetly difrent kind of pst sorry i got sidetrakd their!!! no the pst we ar tawking abowt heer is pulsed signal therapy to regro kartiladj oops my bad!!! but i am bak on trak so ok lets go!!!
Rest in peace, Professor Snape. Remember that one time Dennis the Vizsla subbed for your Potions class?
PS: Hey, cancer, that’s enough for one month.
Having been shuffled from department to department ever since the university switched from a regular college to a school of magic, I thought I had finally found a long-term home teaching Herbology. Unfortunately, the students seem to have it in for me, and lodge yet more complaints about my performance with the dean of the college, Santa. I mean, Dumbledore.
After being shuffled from Potions to Magical Creatures, I have tried to give the students the benefit of my extensive experience with various beasts and varmints unknown to the general muggle population. Unfortunately, it appears that the children are not interested in learning about such things, and I once again am summoned before Dean Santa to explain myself.
Having returned from my long sabbatical, I found the university I came back to is not the university that I left. In an effort to increase enrollment, the dean has changed it from an institute of higher learning into a school of magic. Although I was at first reluctant to teach in such an environment, a Christmas ham persuaded me to take a position as potions instructor. Little did I know that dark forces were conspiring against me …
After having made sure that the Toxic Avenger and the Creature from the Black Lagoon will be able to share their apartment without killing each other, I am now on my way back to the university to reclaim my office and get back to work in the anthropology department. However, upon reaching the campus, I discover that the school’s focus has changed dramatically …