All’s Sour That Ends Sour

Cyberman #1: “You and your accomplices are now prisoners of the cyber authority. You will be transported to an appropriate detention facility.”
Lulu: “Does this mean we’re all going to prison?”
Charlee: “Probably.”
Chaplin: “Given Dennis’s track record I’m surprised we’ve stayed out of jail this long, to be honest.”
Cyberman #2: “Where did you get your stereo installed?”
Cybersqueekle: “At Fry’s.”

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Heavy. Metal.

Cyberman #1: “We have apprehended a small group of furry hackers. Awaiting further instructions.”
Chaplin: “They’re ‘ever so nice’, eh, Lulu?”
Lulu: “Well in my defense, they did tell me I was pretty.”
Spicoli: “Psst. You metal dudes didn’t happen to bring any Doritos, did you?”
Cyberman #2: “No. Go away.”

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The Rice Pirates

Having spent the last several hours crawling through filthy ventilation systems with John McClane has finally paid off, as we have reached a vent that will give us access to the main hangar of the Spud Star, where our ship, the Orca, is sits unguarded. Darth Tater has deployed all of his Spudtroopers to the other decks, never considering that we might be planning to steal aboard our vessel and escape; he knows me too well to think I would ever abandon the rest of the crew, who are his prisoners. But he has not reckoned on John McClane, who considers our teammates hippies, and has no compunction about ruthlessly abandoning them to make our getaway. Little do we know that out there in the coldness of space, closer than we could imagine, there lurks a ship carrying men who are more desperate, hungry, and ruthless than John McClane, Tucker, and Darth Tater put together …

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Priced To Move

Upon discovering that he was about to be marked down, my new friend has decided to make a run from Wally World to the legendary land of Target.  But can we even make it out of Wally World?  And does Target even still exist?  Only time will tell … but time is the one thing that we don’t have.

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