The Operative Word

James Bond: “Baccarat. Yes, I can tell you about baccarat. But first you must tell me something.”
Dennis: “Ummm okay, let’s see. Well, I licked all the bacon in the buffet.”
James Bond: “That’s not the sort of information I meant. But thank you for telling me.”

Continue reading

Smurfy Basket

Producer Smurf: “Oh for the love of smurf! This is smurfing ridiculous! If we have to smurf at every smurfing cumulus cloud so the Hipsters can smurf a nap, we’re never going to smurf where we’re smurfing!”
Spicoli: “Dude, chill. You get incoherent when you’re all smurfed up and then nobody can smurf what you’re smurfing to smurf.”
Producer Smurf: “Stop smurfing ‘smurf’! Dogs don’t get to smurf ‘smurf’! Only smurfs get to smurf ‘smurf’!”
Spicoli: “Sorry, what? I didn’t smurf that. Could you smurf it again, a little smurfier this time, and try to smurf your smurfs more smurfily?”
Mouse: “Enough! The next person who uses ‘smurf’ as a general purpose word is getting kicked out of this basket and can find his own way home!”

Continue reading

Hungary Or Hunger-y?

Mouse: “As you all know, Dennis got himself ‘repatriated’ to Hungary. The purpose of this meeting is to form a rescue party to bring him back.”
Vermin: “HISSS! I don’t see why we have to bother! Once he starts shredding all their furniture, they’ll ship him back here on their own dime!”

Continue reading

NASA Canasta


Senator #1: “Mr. Vizsla, are you sure we can’t get you some bottled water or a snack that’s not served in a dog food bowl?”
Dennis: “Well, since you’re offering …”

Continue reading

Mad Ants Beyond Sugardome: The Final Round

Mr. Nibbles: “All right, Mr. Dennis, I’ve got your itinerary for your trip to D.C.”
Dennis: “Thanks, Mr. Nibbles!”
Producer Smurf: “Okay, ha ha, very funny, you put the show runner in a cage. Now smurf me out of here. Pink Panther, it’s your turn to smurf on the ant.”
Pink Panther: “I think I’m pretty happy out here.”
Spicoli: “Dude, we’re rolling. Do something interesting.”

Continue reading