Secret Agent Marsupial

varmint_1

Secret Service Agent #1: “Okay, Vermin, here’s the deal. You help us defuse the hostage situation, and we’ll give you the mealworms that the ninja hedgehog terrorists think we’re giving them.”
Opossum: “HISSSS! Now you’re talking! But stop calling me Vermin!”
Secret Service Agent #2: “Would you prefer that we call you by your Secret Service code name?”
Opossum: “Ooh! I have a code name? What is it?”
Secret Service Agent #2: “‘Varmint.'”

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reerun sunday a skolarly treetis on how bunneez mite be eeting yore froot treez

hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay happy eester evrybuddy!!! dadas mama and dada and auntie ar heer visitting so i wil not be arownd mutch for a fyoo weeks on akkownt of i hav to follow them arownd and mayk shoor tucker duznt trip them and steel there fud however sinse tooday is bunnee day i thawt it mite be fun to reepost my old skolarly treetis on how bunneez attak froot treez chek it owt!!!

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visitters???

hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay wel as yoo may remember last week i fownd owt that we mite hav a selebritty heer at the howse grooming tucker however i hav ben unaybel to determin for shoor if this is troo or not so now i am thinking i mite hav been pre … preematch … well ennyway it mite hav ben too soon for me to call tmz and tel them abowt it but thats ok i am shoor they woodnt hav tayken me seeryusly i meen reely hoo wud beleev sumthing wot came in at randum frum the internets frum a vizsla waring growtcho glasses and calling himself dog throat????  ha ha oh hmmm trixe is barking at sumthing owtside pleez ekskyooz me wile i go see wot it is ok bye

Moments Later …

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weekend awards serremonie

hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay i am almost kawt up with my awards and tags and wotnot i just hav lets see … wun … too … three … thats a hunnerd and twenty three awards!!! oh my gosh i wil never finish!!! wel lets get started and see wot we can do ok heer goze:

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a skolalry treetis on how things wot fly fly

hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog wel after my erlier post abowt how my canada goose toy cant fly away frum me on akownt of i remoovd its air bladder i reealized that menny peepul wer unaware of birds and there air bladders and so i hav kreeayted this eksawstivly reeserchd skolarly treetis on how things wot fly manadj to stay in the air heer it is:

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a skolarly treetis on how bunneez mite be eeting yore froot treez

hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog wel as yoo may no a wile bak dada and his frend planted sum froot treez on the hill behind their howses the idea beeing that in a fyoo yeerz the treez wood produse froot and then we cud eet it now yoo may be thinking to yoreself that this is a reedikyulus consept becuz evrywun nos that froot comes from the soopermarkit howevr dada insists that it akchooally grows on trees just like munny and spaghetti dada is so silly sumtimes!!!!

wel ennyway it turns owt that the bunnies on the hillside hav ben eeting the leeves and tender shoots off the socalled froot treez and sumhow they hav manajd to eet leeves that are much too hi off the grownd for them to reech yoozing normal meenz like stretching and yet it is well nown that bunneez cannot climb treez so theirfore with my keen observayshuns and uncanny deduktiv abiliteez i hav compiled this skolarly treetis on how they mite be eeting dadas froot trees and by ekstenshun yore own froot treez shud yoo be delooded enuf to hav them

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a skolarly treetis on things wot need to get barkd at

hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay laytly i hav ben heering roomers floting arownd that vizsla dogs such as myself and my brother tucker the other vizsla dog (hoo is also a vizsla just like me only smaller and older and spoilder ha ha) ither dont bark at all or bark at in … inaprop … at times wen we dont need to wel let me ashoor yoo that nuthing cud be further from the trooth and to demonstrayt this i present to yoo a skolarly treetis on things wot need to get barkd at

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King Kong Part II

It has been three weeks since I was taken as a pet by the monstrous ape that rules Skull Island. Sometimes I despair of ever escaping my captivity, recovering the Giant Kong, and getting off this desolate rock; but I am Dennis the Vizsla, and I never give up.  I merely have to bide my time, and wait for the right opportunity.

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Intruder Alert?

So last night, we had a police helicopter circling our neighborhood with its spotlight out, looking for some (alleged) perpetrator.  This has happened before*, so we know the routine:  Lock all the windows and doors, turn on all the outside lights, and wait.  Well, this time, as the helicopter was circling, Dennis suddenly started going nuts over in the nook by the side of the house, barking his pointy little head off.

There’s a big window in that nook.  What could it be?  Did Dennis see someone outside?  Let’s go and find out what has him so riled up …

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