Producer Smurf: “I fail to smurf how smurfing a long bubble bath is going to smurf any mysteries or, more importantly, smurf me any material I can smurf for my smurfumentary and my smurfcast.”
Lulu: “It’s a temporary safety measure. We can’t investigate during an artillery bombardment from the base.”
Horatio Caine: “Yeah, what the dog said. Also, you might consider taking a bath in the sink. You seem to be smoldering a little.”
Producer Smurf: “Spicoli, why do you still smurf your sunglasses when you’re sleeping?”
Spicoli: “I think you mean trying to sleep, dude. And I wear them because it’s so bright here.”
Producer Smurf: “But why don’t you go smurf somewhere that’s not so bright?”
Spicoli: “Because then it would be too dark to see with my sunglasses on.”
Producer Smurf: “Oh, of course.”
Hello friendlies! Lulu here with another entry in my new Life Tips series. In this one, I’ll be demonstrating how you can use your dog to determine how much peril you may be in, via a series of illustrative photographs.
Continue reading “Lulu’s Life Tips: The Stages of Peril”
Lulu: “All right, now that we have a quorum, let’s hear arguments for and against, then take a vote to decide if we want to try to get this economic assistance from Facebook so that we can buy new balloons for the turtle.”
Vermin: “HISSS! ‘Quorum’? Since when do we use fancy Latin words around here?”
Mouse: “Vote? You want us to vote? Has this become a democracy instead of you or the cats just going off and doing something crazy?”
Charlee: “I’ve never gone off and done something crazy. I’m the cautious one.”
Chaplin: “I’m contemplating doing something crazy right this second.”
Spicoli: “Yeah, dude, we can tell from your crazy eyes.”
Chaplin: “Look at me! I’m on television!”
Spicoli: “You’re on the television, dude. Not the same thing.”
Lulu: “Let’s all try to settle down and focus. Now, does anyone have any opinions on why we should try to get money from Facebook?”
Lulu: “Isn’t anybody going to say anything?”
Mysterious Intruder: “Facebook is totally trustworthy and you should definitely give them all your information about everything.”
Chaplin: “Get out of my recessed lighting hiding place, Zuckerberg.”
Mr. Nibbles: “Wow, Facebook really does track you everywhere.”
Spicoli: “Now I see two sets of crazy eyes.”
