While the two FBI agents, Mulder and Scully, conduct their “investigation” of my adventures, I am left locked in this federal dungeon, with only a deranged rabbit for company.  Meanwhile, the gophers have no doubt relocated their fabulous underground kingdom and all-you-can-eat buffet to some even more remote outpost of the underworld, all my various scientific endeavors lay idle, and I have to listen to story after highly questionable story from my cellmate.

It’s enough to drive an archeologist mad.

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