My Birdyguard

Lulu: “So phase one of your plan is to stack the toupees in a little pyramid?”
Mouse: “Well, that’s just to get them out of Spicoli’s van, since he apparently has urgent business to attend to.”
Spicoli: “That’s right, dude. Time is money, and money is Doritos, therefore time is Doritos.”
Chaplin: “Since when does a lizard hire a giant bird as a bodyguard?”
Lizard: “Since I made a fortune in SmurfCoin, that’s when! Go on, Blue, beat up this mean cat for me!”
Blue: “Okay, but first I’m going to need you to smurf another 0.00230123 SmurfCoin to my SmurfCoin wallet.”
Lizard: “*SIGH* Fine. Cat, can you wait around for the transfer to finish so that Blue over there can beat you up afterwards?”
Chaplin: “Uh, sure, I guess.”

Continue reading “My Birdyguard”

D-Mobile

Lulu: “I didn’t know you had an RV. How come we never take it on vacation?”
Mouse: “It’s not an RV, it’s a mobile lab. I borrowed it from my contacts in the government.”
Charlee: “You have contacts in the government?”
Mouse: “Of course. I’m from NIMH, remember?”
Lizard: “Help! Help!”

Continue reading “D-Mobile”

Overheard Around The Back Yard

Mouse: “Why did you guys want to talk to me out here instead of calling a meeting in the conference room?”
Lulu: “We’re concerned that it may become overrun by replicating toupees. Also, we don’t know how to use the calendar program to reserve time in the conference room.”
Mouse: “Well if you ever attended any of my in-services, then you would learn how to … wait, what was that about toupees?”

Continue reading “Overheard Around The Back Yard”

Casual Conversations

Lulu: “… so then after I dug a hole in the yard and scuffed it up so it was full of loose soil, I—”
Charlee: “You pooped in it and then covered it up with the loose soil, right?”

Continue reading “Casual Conversations”

a wood be infiltraytor

hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay i no i yoozually post dispatches frum my advenchoors with the arkeolodjy department on satterdays but i dont hav wun reddy this morning on akkownt of mama keeps hanging arownd the offiss asking dada to mayk bacon and eggs for her so i gess yoo wil hav to wayt for nekst week to see how me and tucker and trixie eskaypd frum the trash compaktor oooops i shud hav sed spoyler alert!!!!

Continue reading “a wood be infiltraytor”

King Kong (You Knew It Was Coming)

After my failure to secure the Giant Kong, I learned that it had been placed on a tramp steamer bound for a mysterious island in the South Pacific. I quickly booked my own passage on another vessel that was following the same path, only to find myself confronting my greatest challenge yet on a desolate jungle island far, far away.

Continue reading “King Kong (You Knew It Was Coming)”