Overheard Around The Dungeon In The American Embassy

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Bugs Bunny: “So what are you in for this time, Doc?”
Dennis: “Well I accidentally smuggled a box of uninspected meat and a crate containing some sort of alien monster into the country.”

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Embassytown

Ambassador: “Welcome to the American Embassy, Mr. Vizsla and, uh, whatever that other thing is.”
Dennis: “I was kind of hoping we would end up at the Blogville embassy …”
Vermin: “HISSS! Nasty diplomat! I am a vizsla too! Can’t you tell by my ridiculous floppy ears, my slobbery jowls, and the goofy expression on my face? Not to mention my wonderful good nature??!! Stupid human!”
Ambassador: “Oooookay. Well anyway, you two have caused a pretty big ruckus for our friends here in Burkina Faso. Those kids out there are convinced you have iPhones for them.”

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Teen Point Five Million

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Vermin: “HISSS! I’m not sure I’m entirely comfortable traveling over all this water on a heavily laden  magic flying coaster.”
Dennis: “Oh it’s fine! I’ve only got one more stop to make and I don’t think it’s very far.”
Vermin: “HISSS! All right, good! Where are we going?”
Dennis: “Burkina Faso.”

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The Chicago Way

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Dennis: “There sure is a lot of whooping and clanging going on back at the bank.”
Vermin: “HISSS! Oh it’s just the cops. Nothing to worry about. Where are we going next?”
Dennis: “Chicago. Dada has an unclaimed box full of money in a warehouse there.”

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Have Some Big Cash

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Dennis: “Okay, here we are in Washington, DC! Now what do we do?”
Vermin: “HISSS! Now we get your money, silly dog! Just give me your photo ID and I will go inside and get to work.”
Dennis: “I haven’t got a photo ID. I’m a dog.”
Vermin: “HISSS! What are you talking about? Don’t you dogs have to be licensed?”
Dennis: “Oh of course! But it doesn’t have my picture on it. It’s just a piece of metal that I wear on my collar.”
Vermin: “HISSS! I see. In that case, I will resort to Plan B.

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Observed Around The House

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Mouse: “Dennis, why do you have your mama’s laptop?”
Dennis: “Well since we’ve had a lot of extra expenses lately with my surgery and my heart and stuff, I thought I’d try to help out by earning some green papers again.”
Mouse: “What do you mean, ‘again’?”

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Meeting Crashers

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Mr. Nibbles: “What do you think it wants?”
Dennis: “I don’t know. It never talks or moves. It just stands there motionless.”
Producer Smurf: “I can’t believe you’re all smurfing out over a bird.”
Spicoli: “Yeah, dudes! Stop smurfing out already!”
Vermin: “HISSS! Now let me show you nasty dogs and stupid rodents how opossum camouflage really works.”
Mouse: “Opossum camouflage? So you finally admit you’re not a cat?”
Vermin: “Meow.” Continue reading