The Pork Chop Express

Mr. Nibbles: “All right, so I think we’ve arrived at a solution that everyone can live with. First, Lo Pan will go stand by the cat tree so the Hipsters can jump from his head to the tree without any loss of altitude.”
Charlee: “Agreed.”

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Lo Panning Negotiations

Mr. Nibbles: “Thanks for asking me to handle these negotiations. Let’s start by setting expectations. Lo Pan, what would you like to get out of these discussions?”
Lo Pan: “I would like to get these cats off my head.”
Mr. Nibbles: “Well, that’s something we can―”
Lo Pan: “Also to marry a girl with green eyes.”
Mr. Nibbles: “I don’t think we can provide match making services―”
Lo Pan: “And to have my revenge on Jack Burton and Dennis the Vizsla! Hee hee hee!”
Mr. Nibbles: “I’m pretty sure Dennis isn’t going to agree to that last one. Also, who’s Jack Burton?”
Jack Burton: “Jack Burton. Me.”
Dennis: “Hey, Jack. Long time no see.
Jack Burton: “‘Sup, Dennis.”

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Royal Flush


Vermin: “HISS! Nasty dog! Stop monopolizing the TV! It’s time for my stories! What are you watching, anyway?”
Dennis: “I don’t know what it’s called but it’s a movie about a beagle who becomes the king of England. Also, some girl marries a lumberjack.”

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Hungary Or Hunger-y?

Mouse: “As you all know, Dennis got himself ‘repatriated’ to Hungary. The purpose of this meeting is to form a rescue party to bring him back.”
Vermin: “HISSS! I don’t see why we have to bother! Once he starts shredding all their furniture, they’ll ship him back here on their own dime!”

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NASA Canasta


Senator #1: “Mr. Vizsla, are you sure we can’t get you some bottled water or a snack that’s not served in a dog food bowl?”
Dennis: “Well, since you’re offering …”

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