Having accidentally missed the launch of our own shuttle, it had seemed as if there was no chance we would be able to save the earth from the giant asteroid on a collision course; but, at the last moment and at great expense, we were able to procure a replacement ship, the Orca, piloted by my old friend Quint’s brother, Quad. The earth now has a second chance, and we must make the most of it!
Having completed our astronaut training, our little band of spacefarers is preparing to depart the Earth with our load of Pop Rocks and soda in a desperate attempt to blow up the asteroid that threatens to destroy our planet. But before we go, we have time to stop by the conference room to watch the President address the nation, and indeed the world, to provide a much-needed dose of hope and reassurance.
dispatch frum the see
hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay wel trixie and i ar having an uneventful voyadj so far abord owr noo frend quints ship we ar lerning how to be saylors and quint and i hav ben bonding over owr scars in a verry manly fashun:
hi ho hi ho its off to see we go
hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay wel yoozing my ekspekted thirty persent advanse munny frum the african bankers and joowel deelers and wotnot i hav fownd myself a top notch see captin to take me and trixie owt in serch of tucker and the crashd rocket powerd majik flying coaster his naym is quint and he seems like he reely enjoys his wurk: