Christmas Break

Charlee: “The most bizarre aspect of this is Spicoli being right all along about Bumble being Producer Smurf.”
Producer Smurf: “Well I hope you’re happy! You’ve ruined everything! This was going to be the most smurfy prison break/Christmas movie mashup ever and instead all I have is a deflated Bumble balloon that I can’t even smurf back to Costco!”
Mouse: “Let me guess. You thought of the name ‘Christmas Break’ for your movie and worked backwards from there to come up with a plot.”

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Bumble Fish

Chaplin: “Check it out, Charlee. Maybe you and this monster can bond over your shared shoe fetish.”
Charlee: “I DO NOT HAVE A SHOE FETISH!
Spicoli: “You can like shoes if you want to, dude. To each his or her own, etc.”
Mouse: “Leaving aside who does or does not enjoy putting her face into shoes, how did you all manage to miss an abominable snowman sneaking into the house?”

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The Santopticon

Art Deco: “You dogs are taking this whole imprisonment thing pretty calmly.”
Lulu: “Well we’ve been in dungeons before. Most of them don’t have fleecy blankets like this one does.”

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The Polar Express

Officer Nick: “Come along, now, Arthur. Let’s get these lawn ornaments back where they belong, then we’ll go have a word with Santa.”
Java Bean: “Wait, aren’t you Santa?”
Officer Nick: “Now, do I look like Santa? Do I talk like Santa? Ho ho ho!”
Lulu: “Yes, yes you do. And you just said ‘Ho ho ho’ for like the fifth time.”

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Classic Dennis: The War on Santa

As has become a holiday tradition around here, this Christmas Eve I am re-running one of Dennis’s classic adventures, when he, Tucker, and Trouble resorted to extreme measures in an attempt to get off the “Naughty” list, while Trixie tried to keep everything from going off the rails. As usual, nothing went as planned …

By the way, I’m pretty sure the Santa stuffie appearing in this post is the one whose buried glove Lulu and Bean somehow managed to unearth out in the yard.

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The Decollection

Java Bean: “Has that gnome been back since I gave him that list of decorations I like?”
Lulu: “Not that I noticed, but I’ve been busy pretending to be going on a train ride.”
Java Bean: “Well that’s disappointing. It’s so hard to find good help these days.”

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Armed & Dangerous

Charlee: “So what do you think?”
Chaplin: “Well, I mean, it’s definitely Santa’s arm and his mitten.”
Charlee: “And we know Dennis and Santa had a long-running feud.”
Chaplin: “Yes, yes we do know that.”

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