Having turned the tables on bounty-hunting Pug Masterson, my friend the Man With No Name is once again in control of his own destiny, as am I. Much as I would love to stay and further study the history and aftermath of the Rice Wars, I have unfinished business in space. To my surprise, the Man With No Name offers his assistance in getting me back there; it turns out he has been secretly building a launching pad, with the intent to leave this world behind and find another one, a world where you can have rice or orzo or both and no one thinks anything of it. The name of this Utopian planet? Earth.
Having achieved orbit and rendezvoused with the shuttle, we are now prepared to travel to the outer limits of the solar system and destroy the Alaska-sized asteroid that threatens to obliterate all life on earth. Our precious payload of Pop Rocks and soda is the only thing standing between our planet and a deep impact.
Having completed our astronaut training, our little band of spacefarers is preparing to depart the Earth with our load of Pop Rocks and soda in a desperate attempt to blow up the asteroid that threatens to destroy our planet. But before we go, we have time to stop by the conference room to watch the President address the nation, and indeed the world, to provide a much-needed dose of hope and reassurance.
Having returned in triumph from Little China, I am expecting to be given a new assignment in my new position as a paranormal investigator; but instead I find the university abuzz with news of impending planetary disaster. The astronomers in our physics department have discovered a giant asteroid heading straight for earth. An emergency meeting has been called to figure out how to avert this catastrophe; and of course, with my stellar track record of beating insurmountable odds, they want me to be involved. Can we save the world? I hope so — all my stuff is there! If we succeed, we will be heroes; if we fail, it will be … Armageddon.
hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay the other day mama tuk tucker and me to the park to wawk arownd and stuf and then sum men came and startd fert … fertal … well they startd spredding powder arownd so mama tuk me and tucker to sit under a tree for a wile then sum peepul came and set up a piknik neerby they wer sum littel samoan girls with there grammy and grampy hoo kept luking at us finaly they came over and askd mama if she wanted sumthing to eet and withowt evn checking with tucker or me she sed no she wuz fine!!!!! can yoo imajin?!?!? so then the littel girls went away but then they came bak with a littel soda and a can of pringuls potayto chips and sed to mama “theez ar for yoo” so mama tuk them and still me and tucker didnt get ennything it is more diskriminashun i tell yoo!!!!
well ennyway wen mama told dada abowt the piknik and the littel girls and the free fud dada sed “maybe they thawt yoo wer homeless wot wer yoo waring?” mama sed in a lowd voise “i wuz waring nice clothes i didn’t luk like a homeless persun!!!!” she sez maybe it is in the samoan kultcher to share fud with peepul but dada stil sez they thawt she wuz homeless even if she wuz waring cloths withowt holez in them for wunse most the holez in mamas cloths are my fault but luk they got mama a can of pringuls so it all evens owt in the end ha ha ok bye