Ad Nauseum Targeting

Clippy: “Perhaps you would like to try a targeted advertising campaign instead? I can help you with that!”
Lulu: “Um, all right.”
Charlee: “Wait, Lulu, maybe we should talk about this first …”
Chaplin: “Yeah, when you chose non-targeted, we all got bombed by a firefighting air tanker.”
Lulu: “I’m sure that won’t happen this time. It’ll be targeted at our subscribers, right?”
Clippy: “Precisely!”

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Disco Lu Doesn’t Advertise

Lulu: “What are you supposed to be? Some kind of genie?”
Clippy: “It looks like you’re trying to figure out what I am! Can I help you with that?”
Lulu: “Uh … Never mind. You said you could help with advertising?”

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Monetization Station

Spicoli: “Now that you have all these new subscribers to your feed, dudes, what are you going to do with them?”
Lulu: “Do with them? What do you mean?”

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Subscribe & Share

Red Squirrel: “So you just put this feed out here? What’s the catch?”
Lulu: “No catch. We’re just making it available to anyone who wants it.”
Charlee: “Yeah, and make sure to tell all your friends about it!”

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Lulu’s Life Tips: Don’t Listen to the Doubters

Hello friendlies! Lulu here with another life tip! This week, I would just like to tell all you dogs and cats out there: Don’t listen to the doubters! If you know what you want, go for it!

Charlee: “Listening to doubters is not generally a habit that we cats have.”
Lulu: “Is that because you’re tiny little sociopaths?”
Chaplin: “Of course not. We’re just very confident, that’s all.”
Continue reading “Lulu’s Life Tips: Don’t Listen to the Doubters”

Lu The Guajome Regional Park!

Hello friendlies! Lulu here! This week we had something called “Independence Day”, which is a day when Mama and Dada don’t work and the television gets played really loud in the evening while treats rain from the sky for no apparent reason. But before the television and the treats, there was a little road trip to a park that the other dogs who used to live here used to go to!


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Hamburger Helper

Big Mouth: “Hamburgers!”
Mouse: “What I don’t quite get is your angle in doing all this for the Hipsters.”
Producer Smurf: “Angle? What angle? You think I can’t just smurf something nice for my friends?”
Mr. Nibbles: “You look a little glum, Chaplin.”
Chaplin: “I’m just disappointed we came all the way to Oregon but we never saw the painted ladies.” Continue reading “Hamburger Helper”

In Memoriam

Mr. Nibbles: “You look like you have a question, friend Hipsters.”
Chaplin: “We don’t understand why we’re having a party for Dennis but he isn’t here for it.”
Spicoli: “Oh, little dudes, this isn’t a party. It’s a memorial service. And that’s how memorial services work. You know, just like the ones for Trouble and Tucker and Trixie.”

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Greetings, quivering civilians! This is Saya the Mighty, checking in from points north. Did you know that we have tree squirrels up here? DID YOU? Well, we do. They sit in their trees and they taunt us. DIE, TREE RATS!


All Ashore That’s Going Ashore


Jack Sparrow: “Land ho! Mr. Spicoli! Prepare to launch the ship’s tender!”
Spicoli: “The what now, dude?”
Jack Sparrow: “The small boat for going ashore! Savvy?”
Spicoli: “I don’t see anything like that on board, dude.”

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