Timey Why-Me?

The Doctor: “So here’s the thing. I’m sure you’re all familiar with the story of the Whos in Whoville and how the Grinch stole Christmas.”
Everyone except Producer Smurf: “Yes.”
Producer Smurf: “Whos are poseurs.”

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Overheard Around The House

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Spicoli: “So you’re feeling better about that snail after you talked to your mama on that gadget, dude?”
Dennis: “A bit.”
Spicoli: “I bet the treats helped too, right, dude?”
Dennis: “Yes, watching you eat them was very relaxing.”

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Rerun: The Doghouse of Justice Returns

The Doghouse of Justice Returns (7/25/2009)

When I last filed a dispatch, I was about to join the mysterious Doctor inside a dog house on the Planet Petco, where we hoped to hide from the fearsome Kongleks. But it turned out that this was no ordinary dog house; it was, in fact, a very special one, and one that I once knew well … The Doctor, astute fellow that he is, immediately notices that there is something unusual about the spot he has chosen as his hiding place:

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The Doghouse Of Justice Returns

When I last filed a dispatch, I was about to join the mysterious Doctor inside a dog house on the Planet Petco, where we hoped to hide from the fearsome Kongleks. But it turned out that this was no ordinary dog house; it was, in fact, a very special one, and one that I once knew well

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PUPSTERMINATE!!!

After being “rescued” from the clown wizard’s dungeon by the mysterious Doctor Who, I have found myself whisked off across the galaxy inside what appears to be an extremely technologically sophisticated phone booth.  I am not sure what exactly the Doctor’s purpose is in keeping me aboard his ship; as far as I can see, his interstellar wanderings are even more aimless than mine were when I was first taken aboard an alien spacecraft nearly one year ago.  But I cannot convince him to return me to the university, and so I must make the best of an extremely odd situation.

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Who’s On First?

Sophie and I have been languishing in this dungeon for nearly a week, no food, the only water what little drips from the cracks in the ceiling. We have seen and heard nothing from our captor since he locked us in here; we have no idea if he was captured or killed attempting to execute his plan to destroy all the Burger Kings on earth. The lack of food is beginning to make us see and hear things that aren’t really there. Or are they?

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The Paris Underground

Last week, I delivered the Rubik’s Cube puzzle to Professor Teabing’s colleague, Sophie, the French puzzle champion.  Can she solve it where Professor Teabing failed?  I can only hope so, or this trip to Paris will have been in vain.  Rather than sit around Sophie’s office watching her apply her incredible puzzle-solving skills to the task at hand, I have decided to put on my hat and visit the art object at the center of this entire mystery:  The painting of the dogs playing poker.

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